Road Unknown
by sunkissedchris
Summary: Ponyboy's journey to manhood isn't turning out the way anyone expected. You're not going to want to miss this ride. - M for violence and language.
1. Prologue

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

Ponyboy's journey to manhood isn't turning out the way anyone expected.

(Third Person Point of View)

* * *

_Prologue _

The three teenagers sat staring at one another in disbelief.

The last year had been spent fighting to stay together; the past week had been the final battle between the Curtis brothers and the State.

The State won.

The youngest brother, Ponyboy Curtis, would pack his bags tonight and leave tomorrow morning. His train would be leaving Tulsa at ten in the morning.

Tonight would be their last night together.

The middle brother, Sodapop Curtis, would stay home with Darrel Curtis. Just turning seventeen a month ago saved him from Foster care services. Services the three brothers agreed were unnecessary.

Darry was perfectly capable of taking care of his younger brothers. The past year was spent struggling to be the perfect parent, even though he was still far from that, he tried. He brought home food, took care of them when they were sick, and worked his ass off for his family.

The situation wasn't fair.

The worst part for the receiving end of the deal, was the fate of Ponyboy. Darry, now considered unable to take care of Pony, was going to have to say goodbye and send him to God knows where.

"For all they knew he could end up in Hawaii," Sodapop thought. Soda smiled a little through his tears, he would be on white beaches with all them girls. That would be lucky. However optimistic the middle Curtis may be, he knew this would not be the case.

Pony would be lucky if he made it into a decent boy's home or foster home.

Both of Soda's other brothers were still in shock over the situation. They didn't understand how something like his was happening to them; they couldn't shed tears when so jumbled up about the situation.

Either way Ponyboy was leaving tomorrow.

All three brothers sat on the couch in the living room that looked the same as their Mother had left it. The youngest brother was shoved in the middle of his older brothers. They hadn't bothered to do anything other than turn on the light when they got home. It was silent otherwise, except for Soda's sniffles, the sounds of Tulsa moving around them, and the tick tock of the clock.

Time wasn't in their favor.

The case all started from a hole in the wall. A fight between Soda and Steve got carried away. Steve shoved Soda, causing Soda's elbow to makes a hole in the wall. The state official for the younger brothers came before it was fixed.

The official claimed the youngest one was being abused. Soda was too old to go into the system now, but Pony was only fourteen. They could still steal him away from the world he loved. The family he loved. The people who loved him back.

The only reason Pony was allowed one last night was because he begged for it. There had been no physical evidence of abuse on the teen, therefore he was granted one last night with his brothers, must to the disappointment of the social worker.

Ponyboy always knew the old women, his social worker, had never liked his older brother. Darry always treated her with respect, but she looked down on him and their home. Now he was getting sent off, like a puppy or something. Moving from home to home was probably his path for the next few years.

The gang came trampling onto the steps. In order for it to seem a little better and not such a big deal to Pony, he switched the television on. He was determined not to loose it in front of his buddies, Two-Bit Matthews (a.k.a Keith Matthew by few), Johnny Cade, Dallas Winston, and Steve Randle.

Steve immediately saw his best buddy's face and knew the news was not good. As he heard that it was Ponyboy who was getting sent away tomorrow, he couldn't help the little bubble of relief that it wasn't Soda who was going. He felt guilty for thinking that, but that's how he felt.

He was surprised when he realized he'd miss the kid.

The silence was heavy has the boys sat around, Pony in the middle. The grief and stress was tangible in the room, almost suffocating.

Little Johnny Cade didn't know what he was going to do without his best buddy.

Two-Bit always thought himself as another older brother for Ponyboy. He couldn't understand how the official could ever think that Darry or Soda would hurt their younger brother. The two of them were more protective than any mother with a newborn baby.

They loved one another, anyone could see that. Anger ran through him, the state was a bitch and the Curtis' social worker was the Devil in disguise. He couldn't find it in his heart to crack a joke, for once his gray eyes didn't dance, but clouded over with hurt.

He was after all, losing his little brother.

It wasn't unheard of around these parts of town, to hear of kids being taken from their homes and placed into the system.

Just the big difference was, most of those kids wouldn't be missed. Their parents either too drunk or drugged to care, or the parents were missing entirely. Worst of all were the abusive parents; those kids were lucky to get away.

They got a free ticket out. It didn't matter so much to them.

However, that wasn't the case with Ponyboy Curtis. He had a loving family surrounding him right now. Not all blood related, but might as well be.

They didn't know where the youngest Curtis would end up. They didn't know where he would be tomorrow, six months from now, or if he would be in the same place a year from now. How would they find him? The state wasn't giving them any answers, that much was for sure. They didn't know what was going to happen to him.

As the night grew older, they dropped off one by one.

Tomorrow would start a whole new chapter in Ponyboy's life. No one saw this coming.

* * *

Continue? REVIEW THEN!

Pardon typos.

Point of view will change. Mostly from Pony's POV, but I may touch in on what's going on with the gang.


	2. Separations

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

I'm excited about this story and happy about the response I am getting. Keep it up and I'll update sooner! Thanks so much.

(Third Person Point of View)

* * *

It was nine thirty in the morning and Ponyboy Curtis knew he only had the next thirty minutes to say goodbye. He didn't know if he was going to be able to keep it together at the train station. The entire gang came with the Curtis brothers. All the boys were tired from staying up the night before, but that didn't matter.

They hadn't wanted to waste the few hours they had left with the young Curtis.

Two-Bit kept chattering with fake cheerfulness. The others simply tuned in to keep their minds occupied. Ponyboy tried in vain to pay attention, but he was nervous. He hadn't been able to eat a thing. His mind kept showing him different scenarios, effectively distracting him.

Time seemed to be going too fast. Ponyboy was not only nervous but scared. He didn't know who he was meeting at the end of the train ride. Not to mention, he didn't particularly like trains ever since his parents died after their car got hit by one.

He was sure a train was one of the stars in the nightmares he had almost everynight; the ones he could never remember.

Sodapop Curtis had to concentrate on keeping the tears at bay. He didn't want to be civilized when he came face to face with the hag who was tearing his little brother away from him and Darry. He didn't want to say goodbye. He didn't want to accept that this was what was going to happen.

In fact, this morning before anyone woke up, Darry and Soda had an argument about the situation. Soda had been furious and crying as he told Darry to find a way for them to keep their little brother. There wasn't anything Darry could do.

Both said some hurtful things in the heat of the moment, but they ended up in a hug curled on the kitchen floor. Darry shed his own tears as Soda sobbed into his older brother's chest.

Dallas pretended not to hear anything. He was angry with the state. Once this was over, he wanted to go out and punch the nearest police officer in the face. To him, they represented the whole messed up state.

In his mind, "They could all kiss his ass." He didn't want Ponyboy to leave the safety of his brother's home. Dally had grown up on the wrong side of town, and knew what it was like to be in a strange place and have to fight for yourself.

Pony was soft, he needed his brothers. Hell, Dal wasn't sure how Soda or Darry were going to be able to cope without their little brother there spitting out wise ass remarks when he felt fit.

Dal wouldn't admit it, but he'd grown attached to Pony. He was just a complicated person. Quiet, yet, he knew how to fight and how to have a good time. Dallas appreciated this. In a way, Pony was just as tough as him. Pone didn't have to become as cool as ice, in order to survive on the east side.

Dallas respected this.

Everyone knew the kid was going somewhere, and they all hoped this wasn't going to ruin that for him. Darry, was especially worried about this.

Dar hadn't felt this hopeless since his Mom and Dad died. Their passing had been like a slap to his face. He had to leave his dreams of college, to take care of his brothers. He knew, without a doubt, he would never change his mind about his decision. He knew both Soda and Pony were appreciative of him, even if they didn't show it all the time.

Darry would do anything to keep Pony with him. He fought with everything he had; it just wasn't enough. His throat ached with the urge to break down and cry. It hurt him even more to think about Soda's outburst this morning.

He knew his younger brother wanted nothing more than to throw a tantrum. That was just the way Soda was. He was happy, but when he wasn't, all his emotions would spill over like a tidal wave. Dar desperately hoped Soda would keep it together until they were out of sight of the social worker.

What Darry would do to tell that old broad off.

If it hurt him that much to see Soda's reaction, it nearly killed him watching Pony. Every few minutes his eyes would fill with tears; he would then take a deep breath and they would disappear for a few minutes.

The tears would fall when he had to get on the train and Darry knew he wouldn't be able to wipe them away. He wouldn't even be able to offer him a tissue.

He shuddered at the thought of where he may end up. He wasn't getting any information anytime soon. For all he knew, he could end up in a home with twenty kids that aren't fed properly. Or he could end up in a nice home, maybe even better than middle class, with caring mother and father figures.

Darry had prayed the night before for his little brother to get placed in a good home. He prayed more that night than he ever did his entire life.

Darry wouldn't be there to protect Pony. The innocent child Pony once had been still shined through his eyes sometimes. Darry wanted to keep it that way.

The entire gang wanted to keep it that way.

The Curtis family didn't deserve another heartache to add to their lists.

"Good morning, Mrs. Wallace," Darry greeted in a low voice. All the other boys nodded in response. Most of them wishing they could tell her where to go. The only thing holding them back from doing so was because Pony was going to be handed over to her in fifteen minutes. Also, they didn't want to make her think her decision was right because the Curtis' friends acted like hoods.

"You need to board soon, Ponyboy. It's time to say goodbye," her eyes shifted over the boys with disdain.

Her nose was so far up in the air, Two-Bit was surprised she didn't forget her shoes when she looked in the mirror. He doubted very much she could see her feet at all. He would've been amused if he wasn't so upset.

Steve and Dally settled for a handshake and few mumbled words. They basically advised him not to worry. Two-Bit pulled the smaller boy into a rough hug, yanking his feet off the ground before setting him down and patting him on the shoulder. Johnny gave Pony a small hug and a smile, his eyes betraying his feelings. He would miss Pony a lot, especially the time they spend talking. Johnny didn't like to open up to anyone in the gang, but Pony was different.

Finally, Soda and Darry stood across from their little brother. Wordless, they smashed Pony in the middle hugging him. As expected, Pony wasn't able to keep the tears away. Soda began to shake with suppressed sobs. Darry kept it together, barely, knowing he would lock himself in his room tonight and cry.

Pony's older brothers told him to call whenever he could, despite the fact there was suppose to be no contact between them. Soda tried to stay optimistic, saying they'd be able to visit, and Pony wasn't that far from eighteen.

They all knew four years was a long time. None of them were sure how they were going to deal with this. Ponyboy would have to deal with this all in a new place, with new people, and nobody by his side to help him. He wouldn't have a shoulder to cry on. He didn't even know if he would be able to get to a phone to call Darry and Soda, just to hear their voices. Just to tell them that he was okay.

"Ponyboy, come now. We don't want to miss the train," Mrs. Wallace murmured, unsympathetic.

"Yes, I do." Pony thought. He wished he could make a run for it and hide under his bed covers like he did when he was six. He shot a rather dirty look at her, before turning to his brothers. Darry gave him a little bit of a disapproving look for being rude, but you could see the slight amusement.

"I love you guys." Ponyboy's voice cracked.

They hugged him quickly this time, "We love you too, Pone." They responded together.

Shoulders slumped, he headed for the door of the train. With one last look over his shoulder at the people he'd known since he was a child, he disappeared into the train.

It'd be a while before he'd see them again.

* * *

**Reviews please!**

I'll probably update faster, if you give me the motivation. By the way, the point of view will change through out the story. Don't worry, you will get to knwo what the gang is up to. Thanks, Sunkissedchris.


	3. A New Life

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

**Explanation: **I know it is not realistic to be sent away from your home from a hole in the wall. It was an exaggeration. The real reason Pony was sent away was because Mrs. Wallace hates the Cutis family; she looks down on them. She hates them because she went to highschool with Grandpa Curtis and they were together until Grandma Curtis came along. She's not over it; a long time to hold a grudge, I know.

Also, I am currently looking for a beta reader. Anyone interested?

(PPOV)

* * *

"Time to get up, Ponyboy. You're going to meat the Lucas family," Mrs. Wallace said. She shook me until I woke up and looked at her reluctantly. I had luckily slept the entire train ride. I didn't want to converse with her.

She tore me from my family just because she doesn't like us. She doesn't have any reason not to like us. We all treated her with respect, except me recently. You can't blame me for giving her that dirty look. She already stole me from my brothers, the least we should get is a goodbye, even if it takes a while.

Dread filled the empty pit of my stomach. I hope I liked these people. Mrs. Wallace said they were an actual family; I wouldn't be going to an orphan shelter. I wondered if they had a nice house or a dog.

I kinda hoped they had a dog. After our old dog died, Mom and Dad didn't let us get another one. I had been pestering Darry to get one, but he said no. They cost money, they need training, and a big yard to run around in.

I think we would've still been able to make ends meet, but he was right about the yard. We don't have that big a yard. Most are pretty small on our side of town. I mean we have a decent size yard, but it wasn't a whole lot of room for a Lab or German Shepard.

I tried to convince Darry we could get a smaller dog, but he said no. On top of all them other reasons not to get a dog, Darry hates little dogs. He claims they don't shut up and try to bite everyone and everything.

I've known small dogs that didn't bite, but they did bark. Every dog barks, I still think that was a dumb reason not to get a dog.

Are there any other kids at the Lucas' house? If there are, how old are they? It might be awkward if they're a little older. I don't know what to do with little kids. I've never been around them. What if it's a foster home with a whole bunch of kids?

I bit my nails, worrying about what was ahead of me.

"Pony, meet Mr. Lucas and his wife," Mrs. Wallace said, cooly.

I looked them over quickly, shaking both of their hands. Mr. Lucas looked like an average man with dark brown hair and dark eyes. His shake was firm and calloused, suggesting he did physical labor at his job.

Mrs. Lucas seemed nice. Her shake was gentle and I felt like I should be careful with her. She was short at around five foot and smiled a soft smile that reminded me a little bit of my Mom. Her blond hair curled around her face, and her green eyes twinkled slightly. I bet she was real pretty when she was younger.

"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Lucas," I greeted quietly. I was still nervous. They looked like they were middle class, but you can't always tell by looks.

There was another girl who was around five foot five. She had sharp looking blue eyes that seemed to look right through me. Her hair was red as could be, straight to her bust line. She was curvy and had creamy white skin with golden freckles across the bridge of her nose. The freckles didn't soften her image, a dangerous air hung around her.

"Mr. and Mrs. Lucas foster Robin," Mrs. Wallace explained.

I smiled timidly at the girl. She reminded me of a greaser girl. Someone Dallas would like to hang around. She was pretty and tough, definitely Dallas material. "Hey."

Robin gave me a small smile, well it was more of a smirk and a curt nod, "Hey, Ponyboy, nice name by the way."

I couldn't help but grin, I was always proud of my name and it didn't sound like she was mocking it, despite the smirk, "Thanks."

"You'll be fine, Pony," my social worker stated.

I looked at my feet and nodded my head, "Thank you, Ma'am." I knew it was polite to say, but it felt bitter in my mouth. She did ride on the train with me, but it was unwelcome company. I'd be happy if I never saw her again.

"Come, boy," Mr. Lucas barked. The way he called me, made me feel like a dog. I didn't like it at all. We all followed him to the truck. Along with my stuff and Robin, I got into the bed of the truck. My foster...parents, I guess that's what they are, got into the front.

The vehicle only sat three people in the cabin. I was happy to stay in the back away from them. They seemed nice enough, but I didn't feel like talking. That was no problem with Robin, since she didn't try to start any conversations.

I suddenly realized I never found out where I was exactly going. "Where am I?" I asked, turning towards Robin.

"That lady didn't tell you where they were sending you off to?"

I shook my head, "No, I'm sure she thought my brothers would follow. Actually, they probably would've."

The corner of her mouth twitched up, "Welcome to the lovely Oklahoma City," she said sarcastically.

I didn't have anything to say to that, so I just sat back. I was in Oklahoma City. That isn't far from Tulsa at all. It's only an hour and a half ride, about a hundred miles or so. No wonder it didn't seem like I had slept long on the train, it must have been a real short ride.

"Listen, Pony..boy." Robin started.

"You can call my Pony." She nodded in response.

She slide over next to me. "Listen to me all right? You do whatever Mr. Lucas tells you to do, because if you don't he'll give you a nice shiner. Believe me, the man hates me," she said looking me right in the eye. She then dramatically draped a hand on her chest, "I feel bad for Mrs. Lucas. I don't know how she can stand being married to that bastard. You seem like a quiet kid, stay that way and there won't be any problems for you. Well not too many problems, anyway," Her smirk stayed on her face the entire time.

"He's abusive?" I whispered for no reason. It's not like they could hear me.

"Yeah. It's a shame, Mrs. L is a real nice lady. I'm sure you can tell. She doesn't talk much, because he doesn't like little ladies to do so, as he told me. I'm sure you'll be fine though," Robin said off hand.

"He hits you too then?" I asked.

"Don't looked so worried. I've been staying with them for six months. I believe that is a new record for me. I've been in foster care since I was eleven. He's not the worst, but he's not the best. I'm sure you'll learn real quick. I just ain't one to break my back for anyone," She shrugged. She basically just told me she purposely doesn't listen to him.

Was she lying? Was she just saying this to shake me up? Robin seemed like the type of broad who would do something like that. I glanced over my shoulder. It was true, Mrs. Lucas is a quiet woman.

What the hell was I getting thrown into? I shrank down into the bed of the truck. I wish I would wake up and realize this was all a nightmare, maybe even laugh about it. I couldn't though, because this was really happening. Robin had slide back over to her side. Her red hair whipped around her face in a wild halo of flame. I doubted my imagination could make that up.

She didn't look like any girl I had met. She was like Dallas in a girl's body, tough and seemingly uncaring. Where has she been? Foster care couldn't have been easy all those years. I shook my head, I didn't really care. I was sure she was lying about Mr. Lucas.

The ride to the house was short, but it felt like a long time. It was long enough for all my worries to come to the surface and fester under my skin. After some particularly bad scenes running through my brain, I'm sure I looked pale.

What if Robin wasn't lying? All her skin except her face and hands were covered up. Her clothes could be hiding all sorts of bruises, burns, and cuts. For all I know, I could be walking into some looney's house because the State thinks I should.

"Come on in and get settled, sweetheart," Mrs. Lucas smiled sweetly at me. Did I imagine a sneer on Mr. Lucas's face? Oh God, now I'm paranoid. I was letting my nerves get to me.

The house was small and painted a fading yellow color with white trim. It was in a middle class neighborhood from what I could tell. I swallowed and went inside, the place I'd be spending the next four years of my life in.

* * *

Another chapter!


	4. Plain Milk At An Awkward Breakfast

*I don't own _The Outsiders_.

(SPOV)

* * *

The gang knew enough to leave me and Darry alone for a little bit. I broke down crying the minute I couldn't see Ponyboy anymore. Him walking away made it real. I won't see him for a long time.

For all I know he could be heading out of state.

I was worried about him for a lot of reasons. I know he can take care of himself and everything, but at the same time he can't. He still has those God awful nightmares and me and Darry won't be able to comfort him when he has one.

How will his foster home deal with something like that? Depending on what they're like, they may not understand. They might even get upset with him for waking them up, when it's not his fault.

Ponyboy isn't much of a talker, but when he needs to talk to someone, who is he going to go to? I don't know when he's going to be able to call, especially if it's long distance. What if he needs advice on something?

I hope he makes some friends he can talk to, though I know its stupid to hope for. Pone doesn't even open up to everyone in the gang, and he's known all of them practically his whole life. I doubt he'll talk to someone he just met about his problems.

What if he has girl problems? He wasn't into girls while he was here, but it's bound to happen soon. I won't be there to help him out. This is wrong. I'm his older brother, it's my job to help my little brother out with this sort of stuff.

All of that got taken away from me and Darry. Worst of all, everything got taken away from Pony. He gets so attached to everything. He likes things to stay the same. He has a routine in the morning he never strides from, he has all these habits. It's going to be hard for him to adjust to a completely new place and routine and people.

I sniff, I've got my head in Darry's lap like a six year old, but I could care less. Me and Darry have gone through a box of tissues and they're thrown all over the living room floor. We're watching a movie, and I can't tell you what he hell is going on because I'm not paying any attention to it.

Darry rubs my shoulder, guessing my thoughts, "He'll be fine, Pepsi Cola. He's tough enough to deal."

"I know," I turn to look up at him. "It's not fair. We still got each other and the gang. Ponyboy doesn't have anyone with him. It's going to take a long time for him to adjust without anyone there for him," my voice cracks as I voice my concerns.

Dar nodded, "You're right. It will take him some time to adjust, just like it'll take time for us to adjust without him here. Maybe, he'll find someone there to give him a helping hand. All we can do is keep going and wait," Darry said softly.

I grimaced, "I don't like waiting."

Darry's mouth twisted upwards a little, "Don't I know that," he said rolling his eyes.

I chuckled a little bit, then sighed. It wasn't that simple. I couldn't just keep going and wait. I'm going to have to, but it's going to be hard. I have never felt this helpless. Ponyboy hasn't even been gone for twenty four hours and I miss him already. I know Darry does too.

What are we going to do?

* * *

(PPOV) The next morning after arriving at the Lucas'.

"Pony, get up," I heard a voice call me.

I groaned a little bit and nodded absently. I felt a rush of cold hit me as someone tore the blanket off me. I sat up and was disoriented as I looked around. Where the hell am I? The day before rushed to me and I tensed up. I can't believe that really happened. I'm really in a foster care home.

I looked over to see Robin standing in front of me with a hand on her hip and the blanket in the other. She was dressed already. She had black jeans, a white t-shirt on, and she wore black combat boots on her feet.

"They thought it was best for you to jump right into it, so you got to get up. You're going to school. Mrs. L got you a bag and it has some supplies in it that I thought you might need. You might be in some of my classes, I don't know. So hurry up and get ready, we leave in forty five minutes. Breakfast is in fifteen. Mr. L doesn't like you to miss breakfast, something about family time. I don't really know. So get your ass moving," with that she tossed the blanket over my face and I flopped back into bed with a groan.

The bedroom I had to myself was a decent size. It had enough room for a twin mattress, a small wooden desk, and a dresser. I had a small closet to myself too. We all had to share a bathroom; it's a little weird sharing with a couple girls. The only women I ever shared a bathroom with was my Mother, and that's just different than sharing with Robin and Mrs. Lucas.

I had showered yesterday morning and decided against showering now. I didn't even know how to use to shower here, now that I think about it. Breakfast was in fifteen minutes anyway, I don't want to get in trouble for being late to breakfast.

I opened the bag they had bought me for school. It had some pens, pencils, a highlighter, and some spiral notebooks. I had just about everything I would need too, unless a teacher asked me to get something specific.

The backpack was good too. It had a lot of room and pockets. It was a nondescript black backpack. It was nicer than the ratty one I had at home. I had been using Sodapop's old one, and he'd gotten it torn up a couple times. So when I got it, the backpack had all this patchwork on it. I had liked that though, it made it look tuff, that's why I didn't get a new one. I was grateful that Mrs. L got this for me, I have to remember to thank her.

I walked to the living room, leaving my bag by the door. Otherwise, I would forget it. It's happened before. Darry was pissed at me too. He didn't understand how I could forget something that I had needed every day since I started elementary school. He thought it should be ingrained in my head that I needed to bring my backpack, yet I still forgot it.

I felt a twinge in my heart. I already was missing my home. The smells, the noises, the gang, and most of all my brothers. I decided I didn't want to think about it. I had cried myself to sleep last night, I didn't need to start crying again now.

"Hello, Ponyboy," Mrs. L greeted me with a smile.

"Good morning, everyone. It smells delicious," I murmured politely.

"Thank you, darling," Mrs. L said. I saw Robin helping her out with a frown on her face. She seemed to be in a worse mood now than she had been in my room. Maybe cooking was her job, another lady thing Mr. L thinks she should do. Or she could just not be a morning person.

I walked over and leaned against the counter next to where Mrs. L was cooking. Mr. L watched me cross the room, I don't know why I found it so unnerving. "Thank you for getting me the backpack and supplies," I said, meeting her eyes for a second.

"No problem, you were going to need them. I hope you like them?"

"Yes, I do," I said simply.

"Now sit down and I'll get you some breakfast. You can't go to school with an empty stomach," she motioned me towards the table.

Food was the last thing I wanted. I didn't know I was starting school the day after I arrived. I was nervous. I didn't really want everyone gawking at the new kid. It was bound to happen but it was still uncomfortable.

Bacon, scrambled eggs, and muffins were served. I had plain milk, wishing it was chocolate, but I didn't say anything. I think I made a face every time I drank it. It's just doesn't taste that great to me. I'm pretty sure Robin saw the face I was making, because she was smirking at me.

At the table it was dead silent, except for the crinkle of Mr. Lucas turning the page on his newspaper. I felt awkward. It was so damn quiet, it's weird.

Thankfully, me and Robin had to go catch a bus for school. We left and the silence between us now stretched out. At least it wasn't as awkward as breakfast. We got on the bus and Robin turned toward me and said, "You'll get use to it." That's all she said the entire ride to school.

How the hell did she know what I was thinking?

This was going to be harder than I thought.

* * *

Thanks for all the great review I got. I appreciate them and I hope you all continue sending them. They're a pleasure to read.

Excuse my typos, please.


	5. First Day Blues

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

Warning: Cursing

Please excuse typos.

(PPOV)

* * *

School sucks.

I know everyone knows this, but it's never sucked this much ever. I hate new schools. The only person I know is Robin. The guys she hangs out hate me! I didn't say anything except my name.

What the fuck.

Not to mention, she thinks it's hilarious. She won't even tell them to back off. I thought she understood what was going on with me. She said something about moving around between fosters homes, didn't she? I guess she wants me to suffer like she did. That is....bitchy. I don't like calling girls stuff like that, but it is true.

The student population's reaction to the new student was mixed. Some of the kids just ignored me like I'm nothing, that is fine by me. In fact, it may even be preferable. Then there were the others who didn't stop bothering me. Asking questions and spreading the information to all of those too scared to ask, or polite enough not to ask some really embarrassing questions. (I can't even think about what this one girl asked me.) Other kids were just plain assholes. I had expected it, but were the thirty paper balls to the back of my head necessary? I don't think so, but hey that's only my opinion. Not like anyone cares about my opinion.

Greasers looked at me sympathetically as some Soc, who had been bugging me in history, came by and knocked all the text books I had in my hand to the floor. The difference between here and back in Tulsa is nobody knows I'm Darry and Soda's little brother. That means I can't use that as an excuse for some Socs not to beat my face in. It's also not an excuse for any of the Greasers here to help me out.

I never realized how much I ride on my brothers' reputations. I can fight when I have to, but they certainly are a reason why I never really had to. Sure I have a good build, but I'm still smaller than usual and a year younger than everyone in my class. Things really seem to be stacking against me.

In science, Robin is my partner. She was the only one without a partner. I couldn't blame her, she was the only Greaser in Honors Chemistry. She actually was civil in that class, and she knew what she was doing on the lab. She even offered to help me out with the notes I missed on the chapter. She's in a lot of my classes, but Chem is the only one were near each other. I got shoved in the back of all my classes because I came in the middle of the year, just another perk of being the new kid.

Most kids like being in the back. I don't. Sure, it was useful because kids couldn't throw as much considering they'd have to turn around in order to do so, but somehow they still managed too. I guess, my new school mates have amazing talents like that.

The reason I hate the back is because I can't concentrate back there. I keep watching everything except the teacher. In my math class, there is this little blonde girl who is adorable. I could hear her from my seat jabbering away about nothing other than cartoons. The whole class I was imagining what would happen with her and Two-Bit together.

My last name ends with C, so this is not usually a problem. Maybe, I'll ask the teachers if I could switch my seat sometime...

I have a shit load of work to make up. Another negative of coming during the middle of the school year. Some of it is on stuff I already did. It's repetitious, but at least I didn't miss stuff I don't know. Just because I'm not in Tulsa with Darry looking over my shoulder, doesn't mean I want my averages to drop.

The freaking cherry on top was the crap locker I got. Of course, it's not near any classrooms. You know the lockers that are in the middle of nowhere and are either hanging off by a hinge or don't open, yeah well there's mine, right in the middle. The hinge on the bottom is broken, but the top gets stuck when you open and close it. So I have to squat down and yank it open from the bottom and kick it shut.

I was actually grateful for the awful location when I fell on my ass this morning when I first tried to open it. I was embarrassed, but luckily no one was there to see my clown act.

Did I mention how much I hate this school?

I almost missed the bus home thanks to my lovely locker in the middle of nowhere. I was panting a little from running across the school to the bus. I half collapsed next to Robin. I was exhausted after the first day of school. It can only get easier after this day, right?

Robin turned her head towards me, smirking. That smirk was starting to piss me off, so I glared at her, making her laugh at me. I officially felt shittier as she had a good laugh at my expense. "Tough day?" She elbowed me in the rib playfully.

I huffed, a little bitter I said, "Yeah, you could say that. You and your friends, didn't really help that."

She rolled her eyes,"They were just messing around with you, new meat."

I grimaced and didn't say anything in return. I just closed my eyes wishing this day would end and I could go asleep. Robin started shifting around, moving, and zipping bags. What the hell? She had my black chemistry notebook out and I was guessing the purple one was hers, and she was writing in mine. "What are you doing?"

She didn't look up at me, "I said I was going to give you the notes you missed, didn't I?"

"Yeah, but I wasn't expecting you to do it for me. You don't have to."

Robin shrugged nonchalantly.

Okay, I take it back she's not a bitch. She can just act like one.

XXX

"Hey, darlings. How was your day?" Mrs. L came to greeted us in the kitchen. She gave me and Robin a quick peck on the cheek. I saw Robin make a face when she wasn't looking. I would have laughed, but I knew she was just trying to respect Mrs. L, so I didn't say anything.

Personally, I didn't really like her kissing my cheek either. It was a little uncomfortable. I haven't even known her for two days. She made us sit down and gave us some water and chips. She kept asking questions about Robin's day, before she moved onto me. She kept asking about kids I met, if they were nice, and all that sort of stuff. I lied saying it was a good day, I didn't want her to worry. I also didn't want her to bother me every day.

I know that sounds extremely rude, especially since she's letting me stay at her house. I'm grateful for all the stuff and the nice room, but I just don't want to get attached to this place. This isn't my home, and I can't help but feel a little resentment for being placed here. To be honest, I don't like the fact that she's mothering me. No one will ever replace my Mom, Dad, or my brothers. No one will ever replace the gang. It just won't happen. I wish she'd cut it out.

I'm trying to drop some hints, but she's oblivious. Of course, Robin looks at me and shakes her head snickering. It's obvious Robin has tried to do the same as me and has gotten no where with it. I sigh in frustration. Unfortunately, Mrs. Lucas heard me and it started another round of questions. I forced back a groan and plastered a smile on my face. Robin found the whole charade hilarious. I shot her another glare when Mrs. Lucas had her back turned.

"Mrs. L, would you mind if I call home?" I asked sweetly, laying it on a little heavy.

Her face immediately became distressed, "Um, you'll have to ask Tom when he gets home, dear. I'm not sure if you're suppose to have contact with your family."

I frowned and nodded.

Mr. Lucas came home and barked orders for Mrs. Lucas to get him a beer. He didn't so much as glace towards me or Robin. I wondered if us being here was something he wanted, or did Mrs. L just want kids. I had a feeling it was the later. I didn't get a chance to ask about the phone call, it just never seemed like the right moment to intrude.

I was in my room when I heard a loud thud against the hallway wall. I heard low talking that sounded like hissing. Robin's door and the front door both slammed at the same time.

Robin's words from the ride home yesterday echoed in my head. It was getting harder to make myself not believe her words.

I'd rather live in denial.

* * *

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	6. I Can't Let Myself Sink

* I don't own _The Outsiders._

Warning: Language can be a bit harsh.

(PPOV)

* * *

I reached for the phone booth right outside the school campus. Somehow, the end of lunch fell right around the time Soda and Darry would be home for lunch. They didn't always go home for lunch, so I was relying on Fate a little heavily.

It was worth a shot.

On the third ring, I was about to just hang up, when a breathless Sodapop said, "Hello?"

I couldn't help but smile, "Hey, Soda."

"Ponyboy! Darry! Pony is on the phone," Soda belted out at the top of his lungs while I held the phone away from my ear laughing at my brother. He didn't even bother covering the bottom of the receiver as he screamed, Goddamn my brother is loud.

"Are you all right? Where are you? Do you like it there? They're treating you all right?" Soda said in a rush.

"I'm okay, Soda. Quit worrying, sorry I didn't call sooner. I didn't get the chance. I 'm not suppose to have contact or something like that. I'm at school, lunch though, so I decided to see if you were home. Everything is fine here, the foster family I'm with is okay. How's it over there?" I decided not to mention the fact that Mr. Lucas creeps me out and Mrs. Lucas is trying to be my mother. I also decided against telling him about Robin. He would probably start making jokes about us. I don't feel like going through the torment.

"Oh, come on, Pone. You have got to have something better than that," Soda said, fishing for information.

"Um, they make me drink plain milk at breakfast," I said brilliantly. We both started laughing. I could hear Darry in the back round begging Soda for some information. He wanted to talk to me too, before I had to head back into school for class.

"Well that's just torture. I'll have Two-Bit ride down on his horse with his silver armor to save you from such a horror!" He went into a round of laughter again. I was silent, it was nice to hear him laugh. I missed it already.

"That would be worse than drinking the gross milk," I stated dryly, sending Soda into some more laughter. I heard rustling and a loud wack on the other end of the phone and wondered what exactly was going on.

"Hey, Pony. You're okay?" Darry asked, slightly breathless and sounding oddly triumphed. I could hear Soda swearing in the back round that it wasn't fair. He hadn't gotten to talk to me long enough.

"Yeah, it's all good here, Darry. I already told Soda to quit worrying, the same goes to you. Go out and hang with the gang, maybe have a beer or something. You both sound like you need it." I rolled my eyes at the phone booth wall, it's not like they're the ones in a strange city with assholes for schoolmates and a foster sibling whose bipolar.

"Well, I can't help but worry. Do you like it there? Where are you?" He asked.

"Um, I'm up in Oklahoma City, actually. I ain't that far off. I can't say if I like it or not yet, I haven't been around that long," I lied. I hate it here. I want to go home. I want to go to sleep in my bed with Soda's arm thrown over me. I want to wake up and have some crispy bacon that Darry made, and some freaking chocolate milk and chocolate cake. I really need to get over this milk thing, but I haven't had any chocolate since I left Tulsa. Come on! That's like torture, no it is torture. I haven't had a Pepsi, either.

Thinking about all the things I was missing was making me moody. I didn't realize I missed Darry saying something. I felt kind of bad for not paying attention. "...and don't you worry either. We'll all be alright. It's nice to know your not on the other side of the country or something."

The warning bell rang across the campus, with a scowl and resigned sigh I said, "I got to go to class. I'll try to call when I can. Say hi to everyone for me, okay?"

"We will. I love you." I felt a pang when Darry said this over the phone. I knew they were both missing me, maybe as much as I missed them, but I wasn't expecting him to say that.

"Love ya, Pone!" Soda screamed in the back round.

I laughed hollowly and murmured, "Yeah, I miss you guys and I love you too. Bye." I basically just hung up on him, not waiting for Darry to say his goodbye. I don't want to listen to his goodbyes, it seems so final. Taking a deep breath, I pushed myself forward, to my next class.

I sat down at the black table top Chemistry lab table. I grimaced as I saw all the notes my teacher was planning to have us write today. I really don't want to develop Carpal Tunnel. A science teacher of all people, should know about carpal tunnel, and not want to inflict that sort of pain on his students. I guess Mr. Letra missed that memo.

"Either you left a girlfriend behind, or you broke the rules and called your family," Robin said, cocking an eyebrow. I grimaced 'cause the gesture reminded me of Two-Bit. She continued, much to my annoyance, "Who knew you were one for breaking the rules? Maybe I was wrong about you. Don't worry, it'll get easier. I'm sure, you'll be able to realize soon enough that it's not that bad to be on your own."

"Can you stop talking to me? You're right, you don't know me, so wipe the smirk off your face. I don't know who you think you are, but I don't like the fact that you're judging me and making assumptions where you don't belong in the first place," I said hotly, all my emotions flying out at her.

I might feel bad for being an ass to her later, but right now, all I could think was that felt pretty damn good. I don't stand up for myself that much, most of the time I let it roll off my shoulders. Usually, I just tell myself, 'Who cares what they think?' But here, I feel that if I don't start standing up for myself I'll just end up sinking.

She smiled, she fucking smiled back at me.

"So you do have a pair. Good to know. Now why don't you stop pouting like a pussy and stand up to everyone else. You're not an idiot and you're not some arrogant asshole like some people are making you out to be. Why do you sit around and take everyone's crap? This isn't Tulsa, and you don't have your family to block everything from coming your way," with that, Robin turned her attention to the front of the class, jotting stuff down about testing chemical substances with fire.

To say the least, I was a little stunned. Robin knew she was provoking me, but she did it to get a reaction. She wanted to know if I could stand up for myself or not. She wants me to tell the other kids to lay off. Maybe, saving me from social suicide around here in the process.

I sighed, wondering if I should. I really hated the balls of paper the kept mysteriously hitting me in the head every time I looked down at my desk.

In a way, I realized, Robin was looking out for me. She wasn't going to go out on a limb, but in her own way she was guiding me. Telling me what I had to do to survive around here. How many times has she gone through this herself? I decided not to be stubborn and listen to her.

At that moment, a paper ball landed on my desk. I sighed and saw Robins eyes flicker to me. I looked up and saw nothing but the teachers back. I chucked the offensive ball of paper back from the area it came from, hearing a hiss of annoyance and not really giving a damn about who it came from.

"Hell yeah," Robin approved with a savage grin that reminded me of Dallas once again. Dallas would approve of tossing that ball of paper back, if not standing up and cussing everyone out in the middle of class.

The reminders of home kept piling up, but for a moment I allowed myself to feel a little victorious because when the bell finally rung, I grinned as I saw no more paper balls or any other objects had come my way.

Hopefully this will spread around as quick as that rumor that I was busted for having been caught having sex in a stolen car under the influence of some drug. I only heard pieces of the rumor, I don't know all the juicy details.

At the end of the day, I ran for the bus from my demented locker, knowing I was going to have to act a little tougher if I wanted any respect around here. Throwing the paper back in Chem helped, but it didn't solve everything. I was debating whether or not to come clean about the real reason why I was here. It wasn't any of their business and I didn't want to justify myself to any of these people.

Well, I had a feeling it may all work out around here. I even made some friends that I could sit with at lunch, instead of feeling like a looser and sitting by myself at the edge of the cafeteria near the door and garbage cans.

I'd find a way to make it all work. I didn't want to suffer for the rest of my highschool career. I had to make the best of the situation, right? I just need to decide how to do that.

"One step at a time," I murmured to myself.

* * *

Happy Thanksgiving!

Reviews are my pie!

Thanks to xxjohnnycadexx0927 for beta reading for me!


	7. Irony

*I don't own _The Outsiders. _

Warning: Cursing_._

Let the drama begin!

(PPOV)

* * *

Homework is a sign of the Devil.

It sits there and taunts you. You know if you don't do it, then there will be consequences. Sometimes those said consequences are severe enough that you might as well just do the stupid homework. It's not worth all the crap.

Tonight, however, I was contemplating just giving up. I had everything done except for the much dreaded math homework. I sit here and struggle my way through, just to check it and find out I did it wrong, for the fifteenth time. It's starting to get a little tedious.

At the same time, I could feel my emotions from earlier today surfacing. This was the exact thing I would go and ask Darry for help with. I would wait until after dinner, then let Darry check everything else over real quick, and then we would sit down and he would explain how to do the math for me. I would do a few problems and Darry would check those over. If I got something wrong, he would explain it again. Step by step. I really could use that right now.

Deep breath, no use in crying over the loss. What are tears going to do for me? Besides get my paper all wet. "Like I care," I mumbled, dropping my head in my arms.

Yeah, I'm a Greaser and I get emotional over math homework. I feel so pathetic.

I was going to have to stay after class if I wanted to understand how to actually do this correctly. I shoved the math aside. My nerves seemed to be grating against one another. I could hear Mr. and Mrs. Lucas arguing in the kitchen. It was steadily getting louder and more heated.

No surprise, the subject of the argument was none other than Miss Robin what-ever-her-last-name-is. Wow I don't even know the last name of the girl I live with, that's wrong. Robin hadn't been on the bus after school. I thought maybe she had to stay after school for detention or something. Is it wrong of me to assume that? She's nice sometimes. Whatever, I had just figured she was coming home on a later bus. Apparently, she hadn't called and Mrs. L. was getting worried about her because Robin missed dinner. Mr. L. claimed he hoped the "Little tramp doesn't come back."

Mrs. L. was upset that he called Robin that. She also didn't think that language should be used in front of the child, meaning me. Believe me, living with my brothers for the past year, being buddies with Dallas Winston, and knowing people like Curly Shepard, makes the word tramp seem tame. I've heard worse. Hell, I've used worse language than that.

I didn't say that, of course. He shouldn't have called her that. I don't think Robin is a tramp, she's smarter than that. The look on Mr. L.'s face was enough to shut anyone up. Mrs. L. surprised me by glaring right back at him. The mother in her must have been taking over. The, "You do not mess with my baby" look was on her face.

Man did I feel out of place at the table in that moment. I had sat there awkwardly, wishing Robin would walk in there and make some crude remark just to break up some of the tension. She didn't show up.

The front door slammed shut and I waited for the fireworks to begin. If I thought it was tense at dinner, now it was unbearable. I wasn't even in the kitchen and I could feel it. Nobody was saying anything and I could feel my heart beat starting to pick up a little bit.

"Where have you been, Robin?" Mrs. L. asked completely calm. That's scary.

"I spent some time with my friends. The time slipped away from me. I meant to get home by dinner," she explained.

"With who? You're a fucking slut. You're probably out there selling yourself. Actually, no, who would want you? You probably just do it for fun with no charge. Why did you even come back?!" Mr. Lucas roared.

Holy fuck, Robin wasn't making a bad joke in the back of the truck that day.

"Well sorry for being so damn ugly and disgusting, that I can't even cross your golden doorway. I was hanging out with Stephanie. I'm not on the corner of the street like some of your friends!" Robin screamed back. Oh God.

_CRACK!_

I winced knowing it was the sound of flesh against flesh. "Don't touch her!" Mrs. L. yelled protectively. I heard another thud and guessed Mr. L. hit his wife. I got up, feeling like I had to do something. I couldn't sit here like a coward.

I walked out to see Mrs. L. huddled in a corner, her nose bleeding, and silent tears running down her sad face. Mr. L. was advancing on Robin. He took a swing, which she blocked. I knew better than to expect her to just take it.

"Hey! Don't do that!" I yelled. His attention landed on me for a second. Robin met my eyes and groaned, mumbling something like I can't be a hero and to go back in my room. Mrs. L. was shaking her blonde curls for me not to intervene, she made a shooing motion with her hand that got blood on the wall next to her. The way it splattered made me think of a horror film.

I couldn't believe I was in this situation. I can't just let him beat on the girls. I can't stand around and watch this, or sit in my room like it's not happening.

He hit Robin square in the stomach. I couldn't help but think of the irony, I was suppose to come here as protection from this sort of thing. I was taken out of a safe home and put into the situation the State wanted me away from. I fought back a bit of laughter, it wasn't the right time to laugh, there is something wrong with me here.

I dashed forward and grabbed him by the shoulders, ducking a punch thrown in my direction. "What the hell, you should've gone back into your room like I was trying to convey to you," Robin hissed. She threw a nice right hook into the side of his face.

She glanced sideways quickly at me, "He gets like this, especially when he's been drinking," I nodded in response. I could smell the odor of stale liquor on his breath. It's disgusting.

"I can't sit here and let him hurt you and Mrs. Lucas, it's not how I was raised. I was raised to protect girls and to treat them with respect, this is bullshit," I told her.

"Why are you here if your place was so good?" She snapped at me. I didn't know if she was irritated at the situation, or because I was trying to help her and she didn't want to the help.

"I think my social worker set this up. She never liked us. Always looked down at us like we were scum and tried to get me to admit to stuff that never happened. I'm here because this is what she wanted to happen, not because of what was really happening at my house. I had a great life going with my brothers. They love me and now I'm fucking here with this bastard," I said bitterly and out of breath.

I held Mr. L. from behind and Robin used her right hook to knock him out. We shoved his ass into the bed. I looked down at him with hate. He wasn't a man, a real man doesn't treat anyone like that if he doesn't have to. A man doesn't treat his wife, the woman he loves, like that.

Robin grimaced, "I guess I owe you a thank you. It usually takes me longer to manhandle him into the bedroom," she looked at me quickly.

I sighed, helping Mrs. L. to her feet. She was crying and glancing us both over. She didn't say anything. Robin rubbed her back soothingly. I had to know one thing from the both of them, "Why do you two put up with this?"

Mrs. L. sighed and sniffed her nose very un-lady like, "I don't expect either of you to understand. Tom and I have been together since highschool. We've been through a lot, and he is a good man. I love him and I can't leave him. I won't leave him," she jutted her chin and looked at the floor.

"A real man wouldn't hit the woman he loves," I said gently.

"Or hit any other women he sees," Robin said with a heavy double meaning. I gave her a dirty look and Mrs. Lucas just blushed and sighed at our comments.

"Go to bed, kids."

She left us standing there. "Why do you stay?" I asked Robin.

"Living on the streets ain't easy and I don't want to bum around my friend's houses. The other reason is, look at her," Robin motioned to Mrs. L.'s figure in the bathroom, cleaning her bloodied face. "I feel bad for her. I can't just abandon her, she's the first person I feel like doesn't deserve what's being done to them. So what? I take a hit for her. It's not that big a deal to me. Not as much as to her. It's breaking her," I swallowed at Robin's passionate explanation. "Plus, it's the same thing with you. You couldn't let us get hit when you felt like you could do something," she chuckled humorously, "One day our morals may get us hurt, Ponyboy."

"Without them, we'll end up like him."

Just like that Robin and I were on the same side, and I got my first taste of Mr. Lucas's rage.

What a night.

* * *

Thanks xxjohnnycadexx0927 for beta reading!


	8. Embarrassing Nights

*I don't own _The Outsiders. _

(Johnny's Point of View)

* * *

I swallowed thickly as I lay in the lot. The stars were shining brightly, a cool breeze hit my face making me shiver. I couldn't decide if I should head over to the Curtis' or not. I know I'm always welcome and all, but I don't like leeching off them so much.

I need to take care of myself.

Dad was on his weekly path of destruction, as Ponyboy liked to call it. I was fairing without him pretty well. Of course I missed him and all, but I could deal with it. I wish he was next to me now. He'd be able to talk to me forever and keep my mind off home.

It's hard to find people who can talk without being annoying (I'm sorry Two-Bit) and keep your mind of the shit that just happens to be your everyday life. Pone is special like that. I miss the kid. Soda and Darry miss him worse. That's one of the reasons I haven't been over there as much. It's all doom and gloom over there. If I want that, I can just go home and maybe get a beating on the side.

I don't know how to help Soda and Darry. I want to but it's not my thing. I don't completely understand how they're feeling. I get that it hurts, because we all miss him, but I don't understand the extent of it. I don't have any siblings...thankfully.

I wish I had what the Curtis' have. They got a nice home, had great parents, and got a bond that goes deeper than you can imagine. I wish I had a sibling to be like that with. At the same time I'm happy I don't because I wouldn't want anyone to be in the same situation I'm in. I wouldn't have minded a little sister though. I don't why.

I see Two-Bit with his sister and all they do is insult one another back and forth. It's really funny, very entertaining. You could waste a good amount of time watching those two and not even realize it. Karen can throw Two-Bit's bull right back at him. It takes a special gal to be able to do that, then again you can't expect Two-Bit not to rub off on her some. He's just got that personality.

I sighed, knowing I was going to head over to the Curtis house. It was chilly and I didn't grab my jacket. The warm midday sun had fooled me into thinking it would be nice out tonight. I got to try and not make that mistake so much.

Loud music and the sound of Two-Bit, Steve, and Soda's laughter hit me on the steps. I couldn't help but grin in response. It's great to hear them laughing. It means they're happy enough to do so. I can't stand my buddies being upset, especially when I don't know what to do about it.

"JOHNNY!" Soda yelled at me with a large smile that looked like it might break his face.

I nodded my greeting, a bit self-conscious with everyone looking at me. "What's going on here?" I questioned quietly.

Darry smiled at me, "Sit down and join in. We're just betting some bottle caps because Two-Bit here has nothing on him." Darry rolled his eyes and slapped Two-Bit on the shoulder.

I took a seat between the two and Soda dealt me in. Everyone seemed to be in a marginally better mood. I was a little confused why, but I wasn't going to ask because I didn't want to ruin it.

"Pony called today, Johnnycakes," Soda smiled in my direction as he raised me a cap. That explained the lifted moods around the room. "He said to tell me to tell you hi." Soda's face was comical, as if telling me hi from Ponyboy was of vital importance to the world. He seemed to be taking this small request very seriously.

I laughed, "I guess that's why you're in such a great mood. I'm taking it he's all right then?"

"Yup, but you should talk to Darry if you want to know anything. He hogged the phone and I barely talked to him," Soda pouted, glaring at Darry.

Dar scoffed, "We had the same amount of time. So, shut up, Sodapop. I fold."

"Sure, Darry. You didn't shove me away at all. I didn't even get any details. I got the bare minimum because you're a phone hog," Soda huffed.

"I'm ignoring you," Darry grumbled and pointedly turned away from Soda, hoping to end the conversation. I could tell it wasn't going to be the end though. It'd be picked up at a later time. I don't think Soda was upset about not talking a lot to the kid, but not hearing enough. If there is any chance Darry did get more information then Soda, then he was going to be questioned all night by him. Darry wouldn't expect anything less, it was their little brother.

I know how close they are but sometimes the loyalty and love behind their actions even surprises me.

XXX

Someone was straddling me and pinning me down. They hissed, "Shut the hell up. Do you want to wake them up?"

I glanced at the figure looming over me. I was covered in slick sweat and I was shaking. My stomach flipped nauseously. It took me a moment of struggling, winning may I point out, to realize it was Robin who was pinning me. I was in the Lucas' house, my foster home.

I was glad this nightmare at least didn't have me crying. The shaking and sweat was bad enough. Robin huffed and sat at the end of the bed, breathing quickly. "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me. I thought someone was killing you. Maybe they were. Is that what you were dreaming about?" She asked. I don't think she knows what subtly means.

I buried my face into my pillow. God this was embarrassing. I don't even want my brothers watching me like this, much less her. "I don't know what I'm dreaming about. I don't ever remember," I said, hoping my voice didn't shake.

I was surprised when Robin slumped over. Her figure curled up towards the wall and the bottom of the bed. I could feel the line of her body along my legs. I noticed I lost all my sheets and blankets, they were clumped up on the floor in a heap.

Robin closed her eyes, "Don't got a clue what they're about?" No jokes or wise ass comments? Who the heck is this girl at the end of my bed?

"I think it's about my Mom and Dad dying. I don't know anything else about it though." For some reason I decided to answer honestly. I could've made up some tale about being in a drug bust with the fuzz shooting someone I cared about, but I didn't. That could've been an awesome tale too...

"Then what are you thinking so hard about?" She sneered at me.

"Nothing. I'm sorry I woke you up. I didn't mean to. I didn't wake anyone else up did I?"

"No. You would've known by now," she huffed. "Well, I'm going back in my room. Hopefully, you're done for the night."

I grimaced at her. She turned, "God damn I could use a smoke," I whispered to myself. I didn't think she would hear me.

"Come on, I'll give you one of mine," she left the room, leaving my door open. I had the impression she assumed I would follow her. I felt like I didn't want to, just to spite her. I don't know why I feel that way, wanting to spite her and all, but I do. I think it's because she's strong like my brothers or Dally and I'm not. Did I just admit I'm jealous?

I hoped up and scowled at myself for my pettiness.

Robin glanced at me and knelt down, feeling her way around under her mattress. Her room was next to mine. It was closer to Mr. and Mrs. Lucas's room, which was down a couple doors. Thank goodness for that. It looked basically like mine, except more junk was on the floor. I hope my blush wasn't too obvious when I saw a pair of her black underwear.

Robin found a lighter and a box of Kools. Johnny usually smokes those, not me, but they would due the job. She handed them over and slid the window open, closing the door. She muttered, "Try to keep as much as the smoke as you can outside. I don't feel like arguing over how bad those things are for me again. Not yet, anyway," she smirked again at me.

I loathe that smirk. She's always mocking me.

"Thanks," I murmured softly as I took one and lit it. Just the smell of the smoke made me feel better. I was going to have to start all over again with the withdrawal, but I couldn't make myself care.

"Want to know something, I use to have nightmares like you. They were real bad. I even bite someone before. They bled too. I did it all in my sleep though, I hadn't meant to hurt her. I wish I didn't remember mine though. You're lucky," her tone was matter of fact and uncaring, but I could tell she did care. Underneath her nonchalance attitude, I could still hear the impression of fear left from her dreams in her tone. I doubt I want to know what makes Robin scared.

"Maybe I am the lucky one," I chuckled humorlessly at that. If anything, ever since my parents died everything as gone wrong. But, it was nice to know where all my luck was going.

I looked over and saw Robin fell asleep already. I slid the pack of smokes and lighter under her pillow and threw the blankets over her because I was leaving the window open to air out the room.

I knew I wouldn't fall asleep again. All I could do now was hope tomorrow night was better, with no nightmares and raging foster parents.

* * *

A special thanks to my beta for being awesome!

Thanks to all of those who have reviewed, put the story on your favorites list, alerted, and all that great stuff. It makes me super happy.


	9. The Same, Yet Different

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

Robin and I have been on better terms since the night I had my nightmare. We acted civil most of the time. Her jibes and wise ass comments were actually pretty funny when you're not at the butt end of the joke ever single time.

At school I sat with her and her friends, Brian, Elizabeth, Todd, and Kelly. They were all right. The first day of school they were just cracking jokes at me because, like Robin said, I was fresh meat. I suppose I'll admit it, not only am I fresh meat, but on occasion I'm a nerd. Not that I'll admit that to Two-Bit and Steve's face.

Tonight we were heading off into the city. It was Friday and Mrs. L. had coaxed Mr. L. into allowing us to go out for the night. Robin decided that I needed to learn where to go if I wanted to find people to hang out with.

According to Kelly and Beth (Elizabeth), I needed to show my face around so people get use to me. Once they know me, they'll lay off. I wanted everyone to leave me alone, so I was willing to spend the night out with them in order to do so. Not to mention, who wants to hang at home on a Friday night?

I sure as hell don't. Plus, Mr. Lucas doesn't have to work tomorrow. I'm sure he'll be hitting the bottle tonight. I was worried about leaving Mrs. L alone with him. I don't want to head home later and open the door to find her beaten to a pulp. I had voiced my worries to Robin, but she told me not to worry about her. It was after all her husband and her decision to stay there. I don't know if I agree with that or not. Robin does have a point though, we won't be there to stick up for her forever, she might as well spend a night with her husband.

Without us there, God knows what they'll do. I don't want to even think about that.

"Well, Ponyboy, here is where all us greasy gals and men hang out," Kelly drawled. She waved a hand motioning to a brightly lit diner. Cars lined the parking lot, kids hopping from car to car. They probably were all looking for the latest gossip, who's pregnant, who won in that fight, who went to jail. I looked over to see the name of the place is Raymond's Diner.

I smiled sadly to myself, it was like the Dingo back in Tulsa. It was funny how close stuff like this made me feel to home, yet it was still different and far away. I don't know if I wish it were just completely different here so nothing reminded me of home or that I like the fact things remind me of home. Either way, it hurts.

Here it wasn't like I could participate in a lot of the conversations. I didn't know everyone around here. Back in Tulsa you knew everyone and their brother. You knew what was going on, Two-Bit was great with knowing what was going on. It probably helped that Cathy, his girlfriend, likes to gossip and knows what's going on the moment after it happened. Two-Bit and Cathy are talented in that way, they should get a reward or something.

I listened to Brian, Todd, Kelly, Beth, and Robin talk to different people. Robin would explain some of the stories and who was who, but it's hard when you don't even have a face to put with the name. Robin helped some with that, pointing out who was in what class I had. That made things a little bit easier.

I was happy she was trying to include me and get me into the loop because after a while the others forgot I was sitting at the table.

"You know, Pone, if you do something to bring some attention to yourself, this will all go much quicker. Give everyone a reason to want to talk to you, instead of sitting in the corner of the booth," Robin advised.

I sighed, "I know that, but it's not attention that I want. I want people to stop bothering me and to leave me alone," I glanced at her face as she considered what I was saying.

She nodded slowly, "Well, showing your face around and hanging out a little will help, but without putting forth information. That will work. So I guess keep doing what you're doing. I'm trying to show you who some of these people are, but you'll probably forget before school Monday," she laughed.

I nodded, no need to even try to deny that. I already forgot some of the people I had talked to tonight, no way will I remember people I never even spoke too before.

We left Raymond's behind us and headed down the street. Robin pointed out the movie house and I wanted nothing more than to duck out and go there. I didn't though because I needed to know where different places were if I wanted to be able to get anywhere in the city. At this point all I know is where my school and house are located.

Now I can add Raymond's Diner and the movie house to my oh so impressive list of locations I can go to. I was trying to pay attention to the street signs but that was a lost cause. I don't even know some of the streets I walked home on in Tulsa. It would take a long time before I knew streets around here.

The only other place I know around here is the mall. I had come shopping up here with Mom and Dad before. There was a store that sells different home good stuff like furniture, towels, vases, and other stuff like that. Mom loved the store because it has good prices and the stuff is nice. So, as a gift my Dad would let my Mom pick something from that store out. She got to pick one thing only, Dad would pick the rest of her gifts out.

I think he only let her pick that one in case he really messed up on one he bought. This way he knew there was at least one thing she would really love. I don't know why he did that, he loved my Mom and she loved my Dad. They knew each other better than they knew themselves and Dad always got gifts that my Mom adored. He just doubted himself sometimes because his gifts could be rather creative. Sort of like Soda's gifts I suppose.

I realized that there was a car trailing behind us.

I cussed and everyone looked at me, "We got a car on our tails," I murmured, clearly annoyed. I didn't want a fight now. I don't want to fight ever. Plus, Kelly, Beth, and Robin were with us. I didn't want them to get hurt.

I don't want to get hurt either.

Brian and Todd were swearing enough to make a sailor blush. The girls didn't seem phased by it but it was the first time I heard them swear before. I wonder how often this sort of shit happens. I'm guessing it happens frequently like it does in Tulsa.

"You girls stay behind us, got it?" Brian muttered low between curses. The two nodded while Robin flipped him the bird. No surprise there, she would fight for herself. She wouldn't let anyone take a punch for her.

Robin put a cigarette into her mouth and lit it before she handed it over to me. I nodded in appreciation. We leaned against the brick building wall waiting for the Socs to stop in front of us. We all looked cool and calm, even a little intimidating.

Robin smirked at all of us, "Finally, something interesting. I haven't been in a good fight in forever."

"Please, don't expect to much from these assholes," Brian sneered. Todd is always trying to impress Brian for some reason so, he nodded his head enthusiastically in agreement. The poor kid reminds me of a Retriever. I guess he is pretty loyal, but it was kind of pathetic. I guess I can't really judge, I'm always following the gang around. No, not the same thing.

I scowled when I recognized the driver of the Corvette. His name is, William something-or-another. All I know is he is in most of my classes and still seems to enjoy tossing various objects at me or making rude comments. I've been there almost two weeks, you think that asinine behavior would get old. I guess I'm assuming he's smarter than that, how stupid of me.

I slouched and hooked my thumbs on my belt loops. Brian, the biggest out of all of us, took the roll of leader and stepped forward. "Can I help you with something? Did you forget witch way to go?" Brian taunted.

I nearly groaned out loud, I didn't want a fight and he basically just set it up to make sure there is one.

"I wouldn't talk, Grease. At least I got a place to go to," William looked amused. His buddies flanked him, waiting for the ok to come and kick our asses. I think I'm spending too much time with Robin, I'm being awfully pessimistic.

Well, not unnecessarily pessimistic, I never fought without someone in the gang with me. I don't know if these guys know what they're doing. For all I know I am about to get sentenced to a Saturday in bed in pain.

While contemplating the situation, I missed the "ok" and got a nice punch in the middle of my abdomen, knocking the air out of me. Fists were flying and I got accidently clipped by Todd. Great, he has absolutely no aim what so ever.

Robin and I almost immediately went back to back to take on three of the five. Brian and Todd were handling the other two while Kelly screamed for the Socs to go back to their territory and Beth stood there wide eyed.

I landed a few good punches but so did the Socs. I could hear Todd asking for someone to help him and out of the side of my eye I could see him pinned down getting slugged repeatedly. I felt a surge of urgency when I saw that.

Suddenly, I thought about Johnny all alone in the lot getting jumped by those Socs that one day a few months back. I froze for a fraction of a second when that passed through my mind and got a right hook to the side of my face.

I swore and returned with vigor. Finally, I was able to get the jackass I was fighting to double up and I jumped him and we fell to the ground. His shock made him clumsy and I got a few hits in before I went to help Todd. By the time I got there, the Socs were already driving away.

We all ran and flocked Todd. He was in pretty bad shape. He was groaning from the pain and blood was flowing from his nose which I was sure was broken. His eye was swelling shut and boy was he going to hurt tomorrow.

It ruined our night. Robin couldn't help but comment how it ended with a bang. I walked home beside Robin in a gloomy mood.

Was this what I had to look forward to for the next four years? Getting jumped, picked on, missing my family and friends, teachers that look at me like I'm scum, and an abusive foster parent.

I could always try and tell Soda and Darry. They'd be here as soon as they could get up to Oklahoma City in our truck that has surely seen better days. I couldn't tell them though, they'd get in trouble. It's against the rules. I won't hurt my brothers, it's not like I'm dying or something.

I sighed, wondering if my future was as bright now as it was in Tulsa. The people here don't give a shit about me, in Tulsa I had people who cared. I felt more alone now than ever. All that kept me going now was the promise I'd be able to go home sometime in the distant future.

* * *

Thanks everyone!


	10. Happy Oblivion

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(Ponyboy's Point of View)

* * *

The first sign of a good weekend: Foster parents are out for the entire day!

The first sign of a bad weekend: Thunderstorms that rocked the foundation of the house.

Mr. and Mrs. Lucas were going to spend the day hiding out in the mall on the other side of town. Apparently, Mrs. L has a sister who lives over that way as well. It would surely take the entire day up.

You know how it is when middle age women start to talk. It takes a while for them to conclude whatever subject they're on. Not to mention they have to get through the multitude of gossip they have heard over the given period of time.

Mrs. L. hasn't seen her sister in a few weeks. My arrival had postponed her usual visit at her sisters. I felt a little guilty for taking up her time, but at the same time I was happy since I was hoping this meant they would be gone longer than expected. Mr. L. even seemed to be in a decent mood, maybe that means he won't mind sitting there. Even though I doubt he'd force his wife to leave in front of the family.

Since the weather was complete crap, I couldn't go anywhere. There were movies I wanted to see. I wouldn't mind just wasting my entire day at the movie house. The problem is I can't go there without getting soaked. Who wants to sit at the movies completely drenched? I don't.

Robin was held off by the weather as well. I don't know where she disappears to sometimes. I know she'll head over to Kelly's or Beth's house, but she had told me that the two of them annoy her. Robin isn't into the baking cookies and playing with make-up stuff that Kelly and Beth do. I'm not surprised to hear she doesn't go there. The only thing is, it makes me wonder where she does go.

Robin is an enigma. I've been living here for a month and I still don't know her last name. I don't know where she's from, I don't know when her birthday is, I don't know anything that I can't just observe about her. She guards herself too. Whenever I try to talk to her, she finds a way to leave. I hadn't noticed at first but then I started to see a pattern. Maybe she is hiding something?

Another thing I don't know. Robin may have an attitude and come off as a wise ass, but she wouldn't ever do anything too bad. Sure she might get a detention for telling off someone in front of a teacher, but that's not that big a deal.

Whatever she's hiding, I doubt she caused it. She's a good person, even if I had my doubts at first. At least now I can stand her. When I first got here I thought it was going to be living hell around here because of her.

The only reason I would ever say it was hell around here is because of Mr. and Mrs. Lucas. Mrs. L. tries to act like my mother. I've dropped hints that it makes me uncomfortable but she hasn't picked up on any. If she has, well, she doesn't care. I don't even have to go into any detail about why I hate Mr. Lucas. He's an abusive asshole. People like him make me sick, enough said.

I got ended up going to the nearest gas station and stocking up on chocolate and cigarets. I stored them all in a pillow case under my bed. Not the best hiding place but I didn't really care if someone found them. What was the worse that would happen? The chocolate bars aren't anything and I might get a lecture about smoking. At this point I don't care.

I brought my stash of candy out into the living room. With no parental unit around, mainly Mr. L., me and Robin could watch some television in peace. I hadn't watched anything since I came here. After school we came home, did homework, dinner, and back to our rooms. It was just automatic to try and stay as far away from the two of them, mainly Mr. L.

I shoved Robin's feet off the bottom of the couch and sat down, waiting for the movie to start. I'd never heard of it and already forgot the title Robin had told me. I didn't really care, at least I'd be able to relax some this afternoon.

"That's rude. You just dumped my feet," Robin complained as she threw her feet onto my lap. I made a face at her and she shrugged.

"I need some room too and I don't want to kill my back by sitting on the floor. How about you curl up on that side and I stay over here, that way I don't have your putrid feet on me," I flashed a smile at her angry face.

"I took a shower this morning, I smell like Spring Clean or Spring Fresh or whatever bullcrap name they gave the stuff," we were both laughing as she struggle to remember the name of the wash she uses.

"Okay, okay, truce. I have chocolate bars," I said, taking them out of my sweatshirt pocket and dumping them on the middle cushion next to her legs.

"DEAL!" She shouted and snatched one off the seat.

"Don't tell me you get hyper off of chocolate, because I'm not dealing with that." She rolled her eyes at my teasing. We sat in comfortable silence as we watched the movie. It has some action and some romance. It wasn't the best I've ever seen, but some of the fighting scenes had excellent special effects. Overall, not too bad. Though, the romance was a little more intimate than I usually enjoy watching. It gave it a chick flick feel.

"It sucks that kid died," Robin said after the credits were through. We had rearranged ourselves so she was sprawled out going one direction on the couch and I was stretched out the other way.

I nodded mutely. The death was a bit of a tear jerker. Of course I didn't cry, a greaser doesn't cry over a movie. Robin probably has nearly forgotten how to cry. Not to mention they over did the death scene a little bit, I guess that's what you get with younger inexperienced actors. I could see promise for a couple of them.

Another movie started and neither of us moved. I guess we were going to watch this on too. All the chocolate bars were gone. We finished those in two seconds flat. I had like a dozen of them too, so we ate six each. It made me feel sick to eat them that quickly but it was worth it. They just tasted so damn good.

"You said you lived with your brothers in Tulsa before you came here, right?" Robin said it more as a statement than a question. The movie was boring so I wasn't surprised about her starting a conversation. However, I was surprised about the topic of conversation. She usually steered away from stuff like this.

"Yeah, I did." At the mention of my brothers I felt a pang in my chest. Man did I miss them now more than ever. It was suppose to get easier, but it really didn't. It was more like learning to live with the situation than really dealing with it.

I could see the gang all sitting in my living room, making wise cracks at one another. Maybe, someone would tell us about a broad he picked up and fabricate the story to something much better than it actually was. Or, Soda and Steve would be getting ready to go out on a date with their girlfriends while the rest of us made fun of their preparation, knowing if we were in their situation we would be doing the same thing. Well except Two-Bit, he told me he thinks his personality is enough and he doesn't want to buff his shoes for some girl. If Two-Bit found the right girl he'd spit on his shoes all night for her, I know that and so does he.

I felt bad that I only got one call in since the first one. The weather was getting cooler and had been crappy lately, I couldn't go outside during lunch in bad weather. It would draw attention. Plus, I don't know what people would say if they saw me on the pay phone every day at lunch, that's a weird thing to see. I don't need to be the center of any more rumors.

"You miss them," she stated.

"Obviously. You already know all this. How about if I give you some information about myself, you have to give me some. Otherwise lets just watch the movie," I said, laying down my rules. It wasn't fair that she knows so much about me and I don't know shit.

"You tell me, if you're cool with it, how your parents died and I'll tell you how I ended up in foster care when I was eleven," she suggested.

I nodded in agreement. This would bring me on step closer to cracking the case of Robin Whatever-her-last-name-is.

"Well it all started when my Dad wanted to go out one night with my Mom. They were going to go out to a nice restaurant right outside our territory. That night, for some reason, those flashing lights and the bar didn't come down where the train tracks were..." I trailed off knowing she'd catch onto what happened. Her eyes went wide and then she gave me a grim look of understanding. I was glad she didn't offer sympathy. I didn't want it. I still had a good life with my brothers.

I kept the explanation short and sweet. I didn't need to give her any more details. Plus, this way she won't feel pressured to give me details, though if she didn't want to I doubt she would.

"Then Darry gave up college to take care of me and Soda so we wouldn't end up in a place like this. Soda still lives with him, but he's seventeen so it was pointless to the State to take him away. Everything was fine, it's just that social worker hated us for some reason. I liked living with my brothers and friends," I said, melancholy.

"I never even told Darry thank you for anything either. I was always grateful but I never worked up the courage to tell him so. We weren't as close after my parents died as we were before so it would have been awkward," I was frowning and was starting to feel worse and worse the more I thought about it.

"He knows, Ponyboy," Robin said, completely sure of herself.

"How do you know?"

"Your brother sounds like a good man. If he was able to take care of you at the age of twenty without fucking it up himself, I'm assuming he's smart. You may not be close, but I'm sure he picked up on the little things. Even if you don't think so. He probably just didn't know how to say your welcome like you didn't know how to say thank you," she explained.

I nodded, seeing her point. I wasn't a hundred percent sure she was right. Darry is smart, but I don't know if he would see that. We both don't understand each other too well, would he pick up on my appreciation?

I'm not really sure.

"I suppose it's my turn?" Robin mumbles uncertainly. I could see the wariness in her expression, even if she didn't want me to.

I nodded encouragingly. I sat back giving her room and showing her that I'd be patient and wait. On the inside I was yelling to tell me. I think I want to know her because everyone I ever hung out with I knew everything about. The gang never kept anything from me. We knew about everything about one another. We didn't hide anything, we didn't have too. Maybe, I'm trying to find that again and some how I chose Robin to be that person.

Or maybe I just like a good mystery. She's the first person who has ever been this guarded. I never hung out this much with a person and knew as little as I did.

It's probably a combination of it all.

"Well, when I was growing up, my Mom and Dad were very nice. Everything was fine, or maybe I was just oblivious to anything that was wrong. I was happy. Then when I was six, my Dad started acting different. I would walk into a room and my parents would stop talking and it would be tense as could be. I grasped that they were arguing, I just didn't pick up that it was about my Dad drinking a little too much," she glanced at me and I nodded to her to keep going.

"Then Dad started to get a little aggravated with small things, like a toy I left in the living room or something stupid. So, I did everything I could to please my parents, especially my Father. I brought home good grades, acted like a good little girl, cleaned, and helped with whatever I could. He acknowledged it, but then he stopped doing that too. I couldn't make either of them happy. Finally my Dad just went out and never came back, I was eight." She sighed and I could tell this was difficult for her.

"My Mom took on two jobs to support us. I didn't see her much. She never sat me down and explained what was going on. I grew up middle class and I was sheltered from a lot and I didn't completely grasp everything that was going on, you know?" I nodded. I could see her as a little red headed girl lost and confused. I could still see that in the back of her eyes, the helplessness.

"I wanted to help. I wanted to make everything okay. I eventually realized I couldn't. I was pissed and hurt. I wasn't good enough for my Dad to come back. I worked my ass off to please him and it meant nothing. Why should I try to meet everyone else's standards? I started hanging out in the wrong places with the wrong people. My Mom didn't approve and we drifted apart. I learned what the real world was like. I finally understood that not everything is rainbows and sunshine. As if to reinforce that theory, when I was home alone one night I heard a knock on the door. I wasn't supposed to open the door without my Mom there, I didn't care about the rule, but I didn't want to get up off the couch. I heard someone yell 'Police!' I opened up for them and was told my Mom was robbed and killed. They found her body in a near by alley next to a store she had gone into. After the funeral I was sent to my first foster home."

I never thought I'd see that hurt and vulnerable expression on Robin's face. She watched herself twist her hands together and I wanted to move over and comfort her. I didn't know how and I didn't know if she'd accept it. The Robin I knew wouldn't, but I didn't know the Robin in front of me. She really had lost everything and I felt sympathy for her.

I was about to attempt to say something comforting but she spoke first, "Lovely right? I think that's enough for tonight. I've been to a lot of homes since I left my house that I lived with my Mom in, but that's another story."

She hopped up and walked away without seeing if I was going to say anything. I felt bad that I had her tell the story. It brought a lot up for her and I'm sure telling her about my parents wasn't as hard as her telling me about her's. I had my brothers when I lost Mom and Dad, I understood what was going on. Robin didn't understand and she was alone when her Mother died. I could tell she really thought it was better to be alone than to risk getting hurt by someone. She might have a tough facade but she was scared on the inside.

I was using her as my new buddy. Someone to tell all my shit to. She was putting her own theory to test using me. Robin thinks everyone she lets in will just hurt her. Who can blame her for making that assumption? Her trusting me enough with her past makes me think she's going to see if I do anything to try to hurt her.

I don't feel so bad when I realize we're both using one another for something.

I sighed, looking down the hallway where she just disappeared off to.

I whispered to no one, "Still don't know her last name."

* * *

Yay, pieces of Robin's past are revealed.

Longest chapter!

Review would be great!


	11. A Letter Home

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(Soda's Point of View)

* * *

Like any other day, I came home and took my shoes off. I threw my DX hat off to the side, knowing I would forget where it landed later on. I swear the thing hides from me. I don't know why, but it does. Every morning I have to look for my cap.

Ponyboy used to pick it up and put it on the dresser in the bedroom. That way I would see it when I was getting dressed. It was a small gesture that I miss. It's stupid how something small like that makes me tear up.

I miss my brother, and how he knew how to save me a load of time in the morning. A good thing I get up pretty early any ways, or else I'd probably have been fired for being late every morning. Actually, I'm almost late every day. Oh well, my boss loves me and so do the costumers!

I slouched across the couch, looking through the mail. Half of it was junk. I was wondering when the next time Ponyboy would call us. Darry and I come home for lunch every day, hoping to get a phone call from Pony.

I know he's worried about getting us in trouble, but I'd rather get in trouble than not hear from him. He's only called twice since he left and he's been gone over a month. I can't believe it's only been a month, it feels like a year. He would call us over his lunch break. He probably has a social life by now, so I can't expect him to ditch his friends to come call us every day.

I know his foster parents won't let him call us from his home. He's not supposed to have any contact with us. I should be happy with what I get, but I'm not. Call me selfish, I don't care, I am worried about my baby brother. Can you blame me?

He's all the way in Oklahoma City. He doesn't know anything or anyone up there. Pone still hasn't told me a lot about the people he's staying with. That's starting to bother me. What if he's keeping something bad from us? For all I know his foster parents could be psychotic. Or they could be really nice. Steve keeps telling me I'm worrying for nothing and that Ponyboy can take care of himself.

The fact is, he can't. Sure, Pony is smart and knows how to deal with shit, but he doesn't know the first thing about being on his lonesome. He is in a completely different place. I don't even know how to deal with that!

I frowned and continued going through the mail. A cream colored envelope was addressed to me and Darry, I didn't recognize the return address but it was from Oklahoma City. Ponyboy!!!!

I tore the letter open as quickly as I could, eager for any information I could get. I scanned the letter quickly to make sure everything was okay and then I read it through slower a second time.

_Dear Sodapop and Darry,_

_Wow, I don't know why I used such a formal heading. I guess I ain't use to writing letters. I don't think I've ever written one, except to Santa Clause when we were little. I don't think that counts._

_How was your Thanksgiving? Hopefully, Two-Bit didn't accidently light a towel on fire with the burner again. I'm sure something, I can't even fathom, happened this year. You just never know with you guys._

_My Thanksgiving was all right. Mrs. Lucas is a good cook. She wouldn't let anyone help her. Apparently, here, it is a woman's job to cook. I was expected to watch the game, so I did. I think I'd rather play a game of football than watch it. _

_Mrs. L. did have help from Robin though. I know, I haven't told you who Robin is, so I will explain. She's the other foster kid here. It's just the two of us, not a whole house of kids or anything like that. _

_She is the girl version of Dallas. No joke, she's tough as nails. I know y'all are probably wondering what she looks like, so I'll tell you. She has long red hair, blue eyes that see right through me (Intimidating, I got to admit it.), and she has some freckles across her nose._

_At first, I didn't like her. She's a wise ass and very strong willed, I guess you could say. But, she's not that bad. Robin is my Chemistry partner, go figure, she's book smart too. She can fight. We got jumped the other day when we were out with some friends (don't worry it all worked in our favor) and some Socs came after us. The one guy was some dick from one of my classes and me and Robin took on three, while Brian and Todd took on the other two. Really it was Brian who took them on because Todd can't fight for shit. He's clumsy and he got hurt the worse. I'm okay, just a couple bruises._

_Any how, it would be interesting to see Robin and Dallas in a fight. I actually think she could take him if she was pissed off enough...._

_That's Robin for you. _

_How's it going in Tulsa? Any new girlfriends? _

_I'm sorry I haven't called that much. I sit with a group at lunch and I didn't want to leave lunch every day, it would look weird. Plus, the weather as been disgusting, so I would end up soaked if I left lunch to go to a pay phone. I hate that I can't just call you guys when I want to._

_I haven't talked to anyone in the gang since I left. It sucks._

_I know Darry is wondering about school. Everything with school is good. Most of my classes are behind what I was doing in Tulsa, which is nice so I don't have to catch up on stuff I don't know. Right now I'm just going with it, until they start teaching stuff I don't know._

_The kids aren't too bad either. I had to prove that I wasn't just some kid everyone could step all over, but other than that it's been fine. School is school. I haven't gotten in any fights. But, when I first got there some of the rumors about me were ridiculous. _

_One of the rumors is I got sent away for having sex in a stolen car, under the influence of drugs, or something like that. Can you believe that? I think there was more to it, but that's all I caught. I haven't bothered correcting anyone, I don't care. According to Kelly (one of the girls in the group I hang out with) this gives me a "mysterious facade." I guess girls like that._

_Oh yeah! There's this one little blonde girl I met who reminds me of Two-Bit. She doesn't shut up about cartoons. It's almost annoying, but I'm sure Two-Bit and Anne could have a deep and meaningful conversation about the best Disney character._

_I'm rambling, I should wrap this up or I'll write a book about dumb stuff like a girl who likes cartoons._

_Christmas is almost here. I hope you have a good time. I'll be thinking of y'all._

_You can write back if you want to. The return address is actually Brian's house. He said he didn't mind if you sent letters here for me. He understands what's going on and won't read it or anything. He's a good guy. I hope you will write back and tell me what's going on over there._

_Love, Ponyboy. _

I smiled as I looked at Ponyboy's familiar handwriting. He seemed to be doing okay. That's a relief. I was wondering a little bit about the girl he's living with, Robin. I wonder why he didn't tell us about her before? Maybe, when he talked to us that was when he still didn't like her or something.

I'm glad to know that he has a group of people to hang out with. Whoever Brian is, he must be a real nice guy to do this for Pony when he barely knows 's nice to know he won't be alone and has people to be around. I know Ponyboy isn't Mr. Social and likes being by himself, but he needs friends too.

I can't believe he was jumped and I wasn't there to help. That fucking pissed me off. I don't want anyone touching my brother. What does he mean he needed to prove to people they can't walk all over him? Was he picked on? Damn, Pony needs to give me some more details.

I couldn't help but laugh about that rumor. I wish he knew the rest of it and told me! That is freaking hilarious, to think of Pone having sex with someone in a stolen car and high. He's nothing like that at all! Two-Bit will have a field day when he hears that one.

Even though Pony was obviously trying to reassure me and Dar that he's okay, I'm still worried now. I can tell he missed all of us. I know he would, but it hurts me knowing that he's hurting.

I glanced at the clock, I couldn't wait for Darry to get home. Me and him were going to write back. It would be cool if the gang would write to him too, but that's expecting too much.

I'm not sure what I'll put in my letter, nothing has been going on around here. I guess I could tell him about the girls I've been dating. I don't know, I'll think of something.

Oh, I have to tell him about Darry getting his hand stuck up the turkey's ass on Thanksgiving!

* * *

Hey everyone, just want to say thanks to all of those who reviewed and are following this story. Please continue to do so.

I wrote this one-shot yesterday. I'd been thinking about the concept of the story for a while and even tried writing it and didn't like it. Well, I tried again and I'd love some feedback. I have almost a hundred hits and only one review, what the hell. So, check it out. It's called "The Reason."

Here is the summary: The acts of the guilty led to the death of an innocent. There is a reason why Ponyboy doesn't like girls or the fuzz.


	12. Why Should I Care?

*I don't own _The Outsiders_.

Warning: Language. You can thank Robin for this warning.

I think we need some drama.

(PPOV)

* * *

Today was the first day I'd be going to the Lucas' house and staying there alone. I don't know where Mrs. Lucas was going for the day. I'll admit it, I was an ass and didn't listen to her when she explained where she would be. Then again, I do that to everyone.

I was just thinking about this play I'm reading called _Antigone. _The girl in it is real tuff. She going against King Creon when no one else would ever think about doing something like that. She goes against the King's edict all for her brother. She's devoted to her family and religion. I like that about her.

Antigone is bad ass.

Anyway, all I heard Mrs. L. say was she was going out and wouldn't be home after school. That's fine by me. Robin was going to be home with me until she got detention from her gym teacher. How the hell did she get detention in gym? Whatever, I get to go home and relax with nobody there to bother me. No complaints here.

As I walked from the bus stop home, I wondered what I could do with my free time. I wouldn't mind stopping by at this little music shop I saw the other day. They have this beautiful baby grand piano that I'm dying to get my fingers on. Some of the guitars are really nice too.

Robin told me that this little old couple owns the place and if you know how to play they let you use the instruments. Most places don't let you play, unless you're going to buy something. If your buying, I've found out that you can touch anything you want. It's kind of disgusting how money rules society.

The December weather was starting to get to me. It was cold and I didn't feel like walking the few blocks to the little music shop. Instead, I'm going to sit inside and watch some television. I haven't watched any t.v., except the day I watched those movies with Robin.

I'm use to watching television whenever I feel like it. It was always on at my house. It was a part of the back round noise in my house. God, I miss Tulsa more than ever, especially with the Holidays and everything. This time last year, I didn't know I was spending my last Christmas with my brothers.

I shouldn't think like that, I'll get back to them eventually.

Man, when Robin told me about her Mom and Dad...I didn't even know what to say to that. I felt so bad for her. The look on her face reminded me of Johnny. I know how to deal with Johnny though, I understand him. I know what to say to make him feel better. I have no clue, what to say to Robin. Sometimes I piss her off and, I don't know what I said to upset her. I don't like upsetting people, it makes me feel bad when I do. I feel bad when someone is upset and it's not my fault. I was so lost.

I could tell Robin felt horrible that her and her Mom's relationship was in a rough spot when her Mom was murdered. God, I can't even think about having my Mom murdered or my Dad leaving me. I know my parents are gone, but it was under such different circumstances. It just makes it...different. I'd be so pissed if it were someone's fault that I didn't have my parents with me. It was just an accident, one that could've been avoided, but I can't really pin my parent's deaths on anyone.

I wondered if my brothers got my letter yet. I'm pretty sure they did. I keep waiting for them to send something back. I don't know if they will since it would go to Brian's house before it got to me. I couldn't give them this address because we're not supposed to have contact, but I can't not talk to my brothers, even if it would be safer all around. If the state caught onto our contact, I don't want to know where I'd be sent off to.

I felt drowsy and warm as I curled up on the couch. It didn't take long for me to fall asleep. It was quiet, except for the hum of the television...

XXX(couple hours later, still PPOV)

The slam of the front door jolted me from my peaceful slumber. I rubbed my eyes quickly, trying to get a grip on who was here and what was going on. Have you ever been startled awake and not been able to grip what is going on right away?

That's how I felt as a hand gripped the front of my shirt and hauled me up off of the couch I had just been laying on. I was shoved roughly and landed against the wall. I looked up in fright as I saw Mr. Lucas come towards me.

"What are you doing on my couch, boy?"

"I-I was j-just watching some t-television and f-fell asleep, sir," I stuttered out, feeling my gut turn when I noticed the glint in his eyes. He was half drunk, not as bad as the night he went after his wife when I first got here. He had this crazy look in his eye, an almost feral look. I swallowed heavily.

His arm struck out and I was pinned by my neck against the wall, my feet just scraping the ground. He glared at me, that look in his eyes that I was sure I would never forget after this, he snarled, "This is my house, that is my couch, and that is my televison. Did I give you permission to use it? I'm sure Lucy didn't, seeing how she ain't here. Who the fuck do you think you are to come in and use my stuff? I told Luce I didn't want no brats around here, yet I got two of them. She sure is lucky I love her or I would've killed her by now. You got that perfectly good room that I gave you, yet you are using _my_ stuff. You ain't no better than that little tramp running in and out of here as she pleases."

I was wide eyed and beyond words. Even if I wasn't struggling to breathe, I wouldn't know what to say. I was panicking, trying to get out of his iron grip. His labor filled job made it easy for him to pick someone my size up and keep me there.

Holy shit, do not let me go this way! I didn't know what to do. Then, suddenly, he let go. Mr. L. threw a punch to my gut, knocking much needed air right out of my lungs. I fought to suck the air back in, but was punched in the face. I tried to retaliate, but he knew what he was doing, very unlike the Socs we went up against a couple weeks ago.

Eventually, I gave into unconsciousness, my thoughts resting on my better memories of Tulsa.

* * *

(Robin's POV)

Mrs. Lucas was hanging out with her sister today because it was her birthday. I had called her to come and pick me up from my freaking detention. It was an undeserved punishment. That bitch couldn't play basketball to save her goddamn life. Sorry, if I didn't want to risk passing the ball to her.

Then, I try to explain that nicely and coach gets all pissed off. She was probably PMS or something. I got no clue what would have crawled up her ass. Then again, who knows what is stuck up in those rolls. Whoever heard of a fat gym teacher? Hypocrite. She is always telling us to work out and be healthy and yet, she's a cow. Yeah, does she do all of that exercising? If she does, she is doing something wrong.

Mrs. Lucas was lecturing me on my behavior. For a quiet little woman, she sure knows how to nag. I nodded and apologized in the right places. I told her I'd try to be better and all that shit she wants to hear. I can't tell the woman off, for some reason I care.

God, help me. Why do I care? I shouldn't, yet I've been caring a lot lately.

Ponyboy just comes in here and mind fucks me. I don't know why I give a shit about him. I shouldn't, caring gets you hurt. But, dammit, I couldn't just sit there and watch him let people go after him.

I guess him and Mrs. L. are both kind hearted and, have the tendencies to let people walk all over them. It makes me want to protect them. It's not a bad thing to be a nice person, but you got to stand up for yourself or you're screwed, or you'll be screwed sometime in your life. I learned that the hard way.

Yet, I could be making the same mistake all over again. Twice. One being Mrs. L. and the other being Ponyboy. I even told him about Mom and Dad! Was I on something!? No, I wasn't, but you would think I was. I can't believe I told him about all of that.

Ugh, who is he to get me caring. The little bastard.

I grimaced, knowing he doesn't deserve to called that, yet not really caring.

Mrs. Lucas noted that Mr. Lucas still wasn't around. Great, he's probably going out to get drunk. I hope he passes out in some bar and doesn't come home tonight. I don't want or need to fucking deal with all of his bullshit on top of today's bullshit at school.

What a fuck of a day.

As I entered the kitchen, I froze. It was dark, but I could still see that things were out of order. I saw a lump laying on the ground in the livingroom and gasped, not needing light to know who it was.

I was already thinking he was dead. Mrs. L. was talking and broke off mid-sentence when she turned the light on. I unfroze and ran over to Ponyboy. He was curled up in the corner of the livingroom.

I stuck two fingers on his neck, looking for a pulse. Relief flooded through me when I found one. His eye was swollen and his lip was cracked with dry blood all over it and his chin. His cheek was turning black and blue right before my eyes. His curled position led me to assume he was hurt in other places too. The biggest concern was the fact he was out cold.

Mrs. Lucas was freaking out. I glared at her and snapped, "Shut up! Go get some warm water and a cloth." She scurried off without a word.

"Pony, hey Pony, it's Robin. Time to get up." I patted him a little on his not bruised cheek, hoping I wasn't hurting him. I gave him a little shake, gripping his shoulder. I was met with a groan.

"Yeah, I know, Pone. Hurts like a bitch, right?"

He made a face that pretty much confirmed what I said. I've been in his position before and didn't have a helping hand. It sucks when you don't have someone backing you up. I guess I gotta be that helping hand for Pony. He's too good to have to go through what I went through.

I smiled sadly at him. He met my look with understanding. A small amount of communication went between us, silently. "I'll help you up, ok?"

He nodded and tried his voice out, "I'm ready," he croaked. That's when I noticed the bruises on his neck.

"Holy shit, h-he...your neck!" I exclaimed, as I helped him sit up. Painfully on his part and mine, I wasn't here to help him out. Damn the fucking fucktard!

He just stared at me silently, looking like a wounded puppy with them green eyes.

I supported most of his weight and got him into his bed. I used the supplies Mrs. L. brought in and cleaned him up. Eventually, I got annoyed with her hovering. Ponyboy doesn't like her mothering anymore than I do, so I sent her out. I was rude, but I can't help it sometimes.

Pony and I made small talk. He told me what happened, and to be honest, I wanted to comfort him. I just didn't know how to. How do you comfort someone when you haven't been for years?

Damn, I wasn't lying when I thought, "What a fuck of a day."

* * *

Whoo, another chapter.


	13. Embarrassing Moments

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

Yay, I got a new laptop. It's an early Christmas gift, but I'm use to typing on my keyboard on my old computer. It feels so weird, it's taking me longer than usual to type because I make mistakes.

(PPOV)

* * *

I stared at myself critically in the mirror. I still looked awful a few weeks after that beating I took from Mr. Lucas. I was scared shitless of him now. Well, I had always been wary, but it was worse now. All my bruising had turned this ugly yellow color. It was worse on my cheek and ribs. Those hurt bad for a while.

Robin was surprisingly helpful the last few weeks, especially the first few days. She didn't baby me or anything, but she helped where she could. I was real thankful because I didn't want to move. I didn't crack any ribs, but it felt like it. Mrs. L. was horrified by the whole ordeal and acted like nothing happened.

Yeah, the only difference is my face looked like a toddler's water painting, but don't worry your husband didn't do that with his fists. He isn't a psychotic asshole who may beat you to death one day! She pisses me off. I don't understand how she can love someone so sadistic.

He laughed at my pain, he enjoyed causing it. I don't know what good she sees in that. Whoever he once was isn't there anymore, or maybe he was always like that and she has developed some mental and emotional problems.

A plausible idea.

Anyway, most of the pain was gone. I could touch my face without wanting to cry. Hell, I could see my face now. My one eye had been swollen, almost completely shut. At least it had been over Winter Break. I didn't have to go to school and make up some excuse to why I looked like I had been put through the mill. I didn't miss any school due to the fact I couldn't move my torso.

Christmas had been bitter sweet. The sweet thing had been I got two shirts and a pair of jeans from Mrs. L. that I actually liked. The bitter part was I would give up anything to spend the holidays with my brothers. I don't even need the gang there, just Darry and Soda.

I miss them more than ever now. I wanted nothing more than to curl up on the couch and watch a movie. I hated this place more than ever. There was nothing here I didn't have at home. In fact, I had more at home.

Guess what the worse part of Christmas was: No tree, ornaments, lights, or anything of the sort. Mrs. Lucas is Catholic and Mr. Lucas is Jewish, guess whose religious beliefs we followed. Yeah, you got it, Mr. L.'s. We still exchanged Christmas gifts though, because I'm Catholic and Mrs. L wouldn't give up her religion for anyone. She even goes to mass every Sunday.

Way to go Mrs. L., you stick up for yourself on one account.

I know I wasn't being fair, but really bitter. I didn't care. I didn't have to like either of them; I just can't wrap my head around staying with a man like that. It's really said, but it still upsets me.

One of the good things the holiday did bring was letters from the gang. I'm pretty sure that Soda had something to do with the entire gang writing back to me. I had been expecting Dar and Soda to write, I wouldn't say I'd be surprised to find something from Johnny and Two-Bit, but I wasn't at all expecting something from Dallas and Steve. Thank goodness I wasn't eating anything when I read those letters, or I would've chocked when I came across their letter.

I almost died laughing when Soda's letter included a detailed description of Darry getting his hand stuck up a turkey's ass. I knew something had to happen, our holidays always had some unthinkable event happen. I was upset to hear that Sandy got pregnant with someone else's kid. Soda was really upset about it still. I can't believe someone would do that to him, he treats everyone with nothing but kindness. He treated Sandy like a princess. I'll make sure to tell him that it is her lost. I know everyone says that, but it is true. What makes me feel worse is I believed that she was nice. I can tell Soda still loves her.

Darry wrote mainly about his concerns that had to do with me eating enough and school. He didn't touch much on what was happening with him personally. I was wondering whether or not he was dating. I wasn't there to worry about (though he still does) and he has one less mouth to feed, which means he doesn't have to work as much. I figured he would start dating again. I was disappointed, he didn't mention dating. No one else did either, which they would have if Darry was. I hope he does soon; Darry deserves to have a good time too.

Johnny's letter was surprisingly long. He was missing me a bit, though he tried to hide it. His parents were treating him worse. They always treated him worse around the holidays. I think it's because they have no money for nice stuff, or maybe they just can't deal with the Christmas Spirit.

Johnny's parents are two more people you can add to the 'Pony Hates' list.

Steve and Dally's were basically saying that they hoped I was having a good time. Steve promised to eat the food I left behind for me, he'd think about me while he did so. I don't know if this was supposed to make me feel good, or if he was being an ass. I'm thinking both. Steve has skills like that; he can piss you off and comfort you, all with one sentence. Does that even make sense? Dally told me why he had to spend some time in jail for taking a leak in a public place. (I guess he didn't learn the last time that happened.)

Two-Bit's letter was really long. He was putting those extra years of high school English classes to good use for the first time and just went with it (his words, not mine). He told me all about some gossip about this girl that I have no clue about. I was confused through a good portion of that page. The next page touched on some of the girls he has been dating, with a detailed description of them all. To say the least, that took a while. Some of Two-Bit's details, however, were a little too detailed. Either way, I appreciated the time he took to write it all. I was happy to get some information about home.

I could practically hear their voice reading to me as I read the letters. I felt closer to home, but the fact I wasn't there sent a knife through my heart. I'd even go as far to say that being away from Tulsa hurt more than Mr. Lucas' beating.

I sighed, wanting to get away from depressing thoughts.

Oh, I got some news for everyone: I shave now!

Okay, okay, I know it took long enough, right? But, I am proud to say that I started shaving before Soda. (I'm fourteen and Soda started shaving at fifteen. I didn't beat Darry, he started at thirteen. He's a freak of nature, who starts to shave at thirteen…okay I know that's bull, but I'm trying to make myself feel better. )

My first shaving session didn't go like I thought it would. Over the break I noticed that I finally had enough hair on my face to shave. The problem was I didn't know exactly what to do. It wasn't like I was going to ask someone for help, I understood the mechanics.

_I fumbled around with the can of shaving cream. I put an even coat across my jaw line and face. I felt kind of stupid as I looked at myself in the mirror. It looked like I had a mishap with a can of whip cream. I was still slightly unhappy that my brothers weren't here helping me. They were the next best thing to my Dad. It didn't matter now, looked like I had to do this on my own._

_I looked at the razor, sending a prayer up to heaven that I wouldn't slit my throat. How embarrassing would that be? _

_Cause of Death: Slit throat while shaving, accidental. Case close._

_There's no way Two-Bit would be able to go to my funeral and keep a straight face. I know he cares and would be upset, but how do you now laugh at something like that? If I read that in the paper I would laugh about it._

_I was about to start, I leaned forward, looking in the mirror. This caused me to knock over the shaving cream, causing me to jump and the razor to fly. The can finally settled with a final ring in the sink. I starred wide eyed; death by shaving didn't seem too farfetched anymore._

_There was a knock on the door, "I'll be out soon!" I yelled._

_Robin's muffled voice filtered in through the door, "What are you doing? It sounded like an avalanche in there."_

_I just told her to go away, but for some reason she came in anyway. For all she knew, I could have been taking a crap. "What the hell! Get out!"_

_She looked at me casually, "We live together, what's the big deal?" _

_How about the fact she's a girl and in the bathroom when I'm trying to shave!_

_I glared. "I didn't know you shaved. Have you ever shaved before?" She asked._

_I hoped the shaving cream hid my blush. I think she saw it. To make matters worse, a glob of shaving cream fell of my face, onto my shirt. I huffed in embarrassed annoyance._

_Instead of the teasing I thought I was going to get, she sighed. It sounded slightly sad, I didn't understand why._

_"Well, one thing is, you need a razor." I didn't meet her eyes as I pointed to the other side of the room. When I jumped, the razor hit the wall and landed on the floor. She gave me a confused look and retrieved it._

_"Don't throw razor, Pony. Same idea applies to knives, scissors, and anything else sharp," she flashed me a smile. She was talking to me like I was six, instead of a teenager._

_I stood they're mortified as I realized she was going to help me. Robin noticed, "Everyone has help the first time they shave. Well not everyone, but no offence, you don't seem to be getting real far by yourself. Just imagine me as one of your brothers or something."_

_I snorted, "That's not weird at all." I forced myself to relax._

_Robin took my hand and placed the razor in it. "Now, gently go across your skin," she still had my hand, then she rubbed the back. I looked at her confused and she did it again, "No harder than that, or you'll cut your pretty face to ribbons. Now go ahead."_

_I turned nervously, I looked in the mirror. I cut myself once on my jaw line, but other than that, everything went smoothly. Robin sat patiently on the toilet seat and watched. I guess she was making sure I didn't slit my throat. I finished and I heard clapping from the corner._

_I glared at her. Robin just chuckled; she took my jaw and made me face her, "Not bad."_

_She left the bathroom and I took a few deep breaths, trying to recover from my mortification._

_Note to self: Never tell the gang about this._

I'm happy I can shave now. I'm still a little embarrassed, but Robin never said anything about it. Thank God.

As happy as I am, I'm just as sad. It was just another moment I lost with my brothers. I swear I was counting down the days until I could leave this place.

Robin barged into my room, breaking my thoughts.

"Want to go to the movies with me?" She asked.

I nodded. She grabbed my hand, dragging me out of the house.

I don't know why, but I grinned when she didn't let go.

* * *

Hey everyone! I have so many ideas for this, that it has become a problem. Therefore, I am going to let you, the readers, make the choice of where this is going. So please go and check out my poll!

Please keep reviewing, I love them all!


	14. Weakness or Strength

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

I felt like the biggest wuss ever. I can't even go near Mr. L. without chocking up. I start to sweat and feel nauseous and dizzy around him. I'm terrified of him. I don't think the episode tonight helped my situation any either.

_Flashback_

_I gulped as I watched Robin take a swing at Mr. Lucas. "You bastard! How could you!?" Robin screamed._

_I was sure the neighbors could hear. I'm surprised they don't do anything or call the police. It's pretty obvious to anyone with ears what is going on. Not to mention the lady next door saw my face a couple days after my beating. No way would the old "I fell down the stairs" cliché excuse work. _

_I had looked like I went through a cheese grater. I felt like it too._

_That's why I wasn't backing Robin up like I should right now. I was just as pissed as her. You wouldn't believe what Mr. L. decided to do; he took her old album with pictures of her Mom and Dad and he burned it. _

_How cruel can the man get? It was all she had left, and oh boy was she angry, hurt, and upset. I think I have seen her go through twenty emotions in the last ten minutes (since she found out what he did). I'm sure that's more emotions than she usually goes through in a week._

_I wanted to help and defend her, but I couldn't bring myself to move. His sneer has been ever present in my nightmares. I've never felt more sympathy for Johnny than I do now. I can't imagine living with people like this my entire life. Johnny is a saint._

_Mr. L. raises a fist that Robin blocks, still screaming her insults._

_When things start to get more serious, I snap out of my terror filled state, I didn't need to be the witness at a murder trial. I had no desire to be put into that position._

_I sneak behind Mr. L. who had his back to me; I feel a twinge of pity as I hear Mrs. L.'s plead for everyone to calm down. I take a steady breath and jump him, tackling him to the ground the way Darry taught me when he was teaching the gang how to play football._

_Robin flashes me a disturbing grin as she throws a punch and some insults in the monster's direction. It doesn't take long after that to fight him off together. Mr. L. wasn't knew what to do one-to-one, but he couldn't divide his attention and efficiently fight two people at once._

_Robin knew what she was doing and I was use to teaming up in fights with Johnny, making it hard for Mr. L. to get anywhere when we teamed up. Robin threw the winning punch, knocking the drunkard out cold._

_The two of us share a look of victory and Robin kicks him as hard as she can in the ribs. Looking back at me she says, "That's for hurting you," she kicks him again, "and that is for hurting me…" she goes on to call him profanities that would make guys like Tim Sheppard look tame in comparison._

_I didn't think that was possible._

_I take a few deep breaths, leaning against the wall. I didn't know if I could deal with this. I wasn't tough; I never had to deal with this sort of shit first hand. He's more talented than most Socs I've ever fought. He's more violent too._

_We drag Mr. L.'s unconscious ass into his room and lock the door. Mrs. L. was cleaning up the mess left behind, her expression was all stoic except for a soul deep sadness._

_Robin headed to her room without a word, her moodiness seeping into me. I frowned at the ceiling. God help me, I don't know what the right thing to do is._

I was tired of all the hurt around here. I was slowly dipping into depression. Maybe if this place actually had nice people, I'd be able to deal with losing my family for the next few years. If I had some people I could come home and not tip toe around, I could be okay.

But, if things keep going like this, by the time I get home, I will be paranoid and scared to death of my own shadow.

Man, everyday here gives me more and more insight on Johnny. I always understood him pretty well, I got why he did what he did, when I didn't he explained and I understood his side, but now I _really_ understand.

Like the saying goes, you don't know a person until you take a walk in their shoes or try on their shoes. Well, something along those lines. But, damn they are right. I'm close with Johnny, I sympathized with him, I got where he was coming from, but living it makes it so much more real.

Seeing and living it is so much different. I didn't realize what not having a home to go to would feel like, a place to call safe. Is this how Johnnycakes feels all the time? I hope my house can be his safe place, I hope he knows he always has a place to call home, even if I'm not there.

I don't have anywhere I can call safe or home in Oklahoma. Sure, I have friends that give a damn whether or not they find me dead on the street, but I'm not close enough to go and stay there every day like Johnny can with any of us.

I wonder if this is how Steve feels too. His Dad isn't going to win the Best Father of the Year Award anytime soon either.

I can't imagine my parents betraying me like Dally's, Steve's, and Johnny's all have. At least Mr. L. isn't someone I have ever considered close, or cared about.

I thought I was the only one awake when I heard a chocking sound from next door to me; Robin's room. I felt my eyes go wide; the muffled sound was fueling some of the most horrifying images to the front of my mind: Mr. L. holding a pillow to Robin's face as she struggled.

Before I realized what I was even doing, I dashed out of my room quickly and quietly and barged into Robin's room.

She looked at me red eyed and completely startled. I sighed in relief when I realized the muffled sound was her sobbing into a pillow. Then I shuffled awkwardly when I realized shit, she's crying. I didn't have any experience in this field. I didn't know how to react to some girl crying. At the same time, I couldn't believe how paranoid I already am from being in this place. If I had taken a moment, I would've realized it was crying and not someone suffocating.

"What are you doing in here?!" Robin said, while glaring at me.

"I heard something in here and I got worried," I shifted nervously from foot to foot, and then I decided to do the something I did for Johnny when he was upset. I crossed the room and sat down next to her and threw my arm around her shoulders. I could feel her body shaking with surpressed sobs and whatever she was feeling.

She didn't say anything. "Shh, it's alright." I stroked her head as she gave in and buried her face into my shoulder.

"It's all I had left, except for my stupid bear I've had since I was a kid," she sobbed. "I don't have anything left of my parents. I hate him so much, Ponyboy, you can't even begin to understand," she spoke, fervently.

"I know, but a picture doesn't matter. You still remember your family. I know you and your Mom weren't the closest friends, but you know you loved her and she knows it too and she loved you. That's all that matters, not an album or a figurine left behind," I whispered.

She hiccupped, "I know that, but I don't want to forget. She is the best thing I ever had and I don't have anything of her's anymore."

"You got memories of the two of you; you don't need anything more."

Robin groaned, not completely believing my words. I don't blame her either. If I were in her position, I would feel the same way. The scariest thing is I could picture Mr. Lucas's sadistic smirk as her burned the pictures. There's no doubt in my mind that he knew this would hurt her more than any punch he could throw.

This hurt Robin more than any physical punishment.

I rubbed her arm as she gained control over herself. She sniffed, "This is embarrassing."

I snorted, "Are you kidding, all you're doing is crying. You've seen me beaten to the point where I can't move, and you taught me how to shave. What can be more embarrassing than that?"

"Shitting yourself in public," she supplied.

I laughed, "You sound just like Two-Bit sometimes," I sighed, sadly.

"Two-Bit? The one with the switch blade and the mouth that runs more than anyone wishes? Jeez, thanks so much, Ponyboy," she muttered, sarcastically.

"It was a compliment; Two-Bit is one of my best buddies."

"Want to tell me about Tulsa some?" Robin asked. I knew she just wanted to get everything off her mind, and that was fine by me. I was willing to talk now more than I was before.

"Well, the city is a lot like it is here. We got diners where everyone hangs out to find out the latest gossip, we got the drive in theater, we have the skating rink, and parties are held every weekend, sometimes everyday at this guy, Buck's house. I ain't allowed there though, it's a rough place and my brothers want me to stay clear. Can't say I'd go there voluntarily anyway," I paused, wondering what else I could tell her.

"What about the people? Who did you hang out with, anyone out of the gang?" Robin shot off, curiously.

"I had a lot of friends, but I was the kid who sat back quietly. You know that already. I did track in the spring. It took up a lot of time up after school. I was always in A classes, which meant I was surrounded daily by Socs who thought I was scum. That ain't a highlight, but it was nice to know they didn't bother me because of my brothers' reputations and the gang's. My brothers would do anything for me," I murmured.

"You're a tight family, by the sounds of it."

"Yeah, I guess so. Johnny practically lives at our house in the winter. During the summer he'll stay out in the lot. His old man doesn't treat him too well, neither does his Mom. I don't know how he's taken it for so long. Johnny's even quieter than me, but he's my best buddy. When it's just the two of us, he'll talk a little more than when he's surrounded by people. He's real tough, he stands up for us when he has to," I told her.

"What do you miss the most?" Robin asked. Our position had changed so we were side by side on the bed. I could feel the line of her entire body against my side. The back of our hands touched, causing my hand to tingle.

I ignored that question and kept telling her about the gang, there were a lot of things I missed. I don't think I can choose just one. Plus, how would she understand me missing the scent of my house, or the way my porch door creaked? I didn't want to get into what I missed, I wouldn't shut up if I did.

"Steve may be Soda's best bud, but I've never been close to him. He and Dally have never been people I could say I liked, but we're buddies and we stick up for each other. Two-Bit is the wise cracker, I don't mind having him around."

"I don't understand why you stick up for Steve and Dally when you don't like them. Why would you do that? What sense does that make?" She questioned.

"They've just always been there. I guess it doesn't make sense. It doesn't really have to; it's just the way it is. Plus, Steve and Soda are tight as can be; neither of us would hurt Soda. Dally cares a lot about Johnny, and Johnny is my best buddy. Dar and Dal get along real well too. It just works. I can't really complain about them, I miss them too. It's just that Dal is a little more of a JD than a Greaser, and Steve thinks I'm just this tag along kid. I don't like it."

"Hmmm," I looked over at her, she had her eyes shut. I was guessing that was the only response I was going to get. I made a move to leave, but her arm went across my chest as she turned. I froze and looked at her startled; she was fast asleep and looked peaceful. I didn't want to bother her, so I settled back down.

I thought back over the events that took place earlier, I felt a shiver go down my spine. I didn't feel safe here, but I didn't want to worry about that right now.

I felt warm and comfortable, my eyes drifted shut and I dropped off into a dream with country houses, nice people, and bright stars lighting my way.

* * *

Whoo, another chapter. I got this one up quickly. Now I have to go and do two hours of homework, yay. Anyway, thanks for reviewing and all of that, please keep doing so.

Also, my **poll** is still up. You can decide where I go with this story. I'll be taking it down either tomorrow or the following day, so **if you haven't voted go do so!!**


	15. Joyful Day in Oklahoma City

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

"I don't trust you when you have that mischievous smile on your face," I grumbled as Robin towed me down the street. She looked back and rolled her eyes.

"What do you think I'm going to do? I'm not going to get us in trouble. I promise you're going to love this surprise," she grinned.

I narrowed my eyes at her, "I like surprises on Christmas, I like surprises on my birthday, but I don't like them when there is no reason for surprises. What the hell are you up to?" I demanded.

She wasn't fazed, "Just shut up. On Christmas and your birthday you expect something, that's not a real surprise. That's just an expected unknown present. This is way better and you're going to love me for it, I know it. So shut up until we get there, you're lucky I don't blind fold you or something."

I groaned, "You wouldn't."

"I would to get what I want and you know it, and right now I want to surprise you," she glared at me. I knew she wasn't kidding; she'd tie me up and throw me in the back of Todd's truck if she had to. I sighed, annoyed, but kept my mouth shut.

I didn't want a stupid surprise. What could she even be surprising me with? There's no reason for anything like this. I needed to go home and study for midterms, not spend the day getting towed around not knowing what's going on.

The worst part is I think Brian, Todd, Beth, and Kelly know what are going on. They kept smirking and snickering with Robin and I was out of the loop the entire time. I basically sat there feeling like a dumb ass because I didn't know what they were going on about.

I asked them what they're problem was and they acted all innocent, then they walked away laughing. Asses.

So, my mood was already sour from that yesterday and this was making it worse. They knew Robin had something planned, and they didn't tell me. They laughed to, what in God's name does she have planned?

"Should I be scared?" I asked, warily.

Robin snorted, "No, stop being stupid. I'm not going to get you hurt, arrested, or torture you in any way. Like I said before, you're going to like this. You just got to be patient!" She sounded exasperated by the end of her explanation, and then again so was I. I wanted to know what was going on.

Though, I have to admit, my curiosity was spiking and I was a little excited. Apparently, I was going to slow for her liking because she grabbed my hand and started dragging me. "If you go any slower we won't get there until tomorrow! You're going to make us late."

"Late for what?" I asked.

"Nice try, but I'm not telling you! You're so damn stubborn, Ponyboy!"

"So are you, you won't tell me," I shot back.

"I'm keeping this a secret until we get there, even if your nagging kills me."

"If it kills you, I'll never get there and find out my surprise."

"Exactly, so if you want to find out, shut up," Robin said with a scowl on her face.

I continued contemplating what she could possibly be surprising me with. I wasn't really that worried about it, I was just bugging her because she was cute when she got annoyed. She would narrow her eyes and her cheeks would flush, so adorable.

I wasn't sure where things were standing between the two of us. All the walls seemed to be coming down on both sides. Whenever we had a problem we went to each other for help. I didn't know if this was because she liked me the way I like her, or because we had to stick together in that house. Either way, we were getting closer.

The other morning when I woke up in her room, the night she cried, neither of us had moved after we woke up. It wasn't awkward or anything either. We just lay there, her using my shoulder as a pillow and her arm thrown around me, while my arm draped over her waist.

I don't know if she just wanted comfort from a friend or more. I never really wanted to be close to a girl, and now that I do, I wish I paid a little more attention to what the gang would say about their expeditions. I always thought it was stupid that they made plans and used techniques to catch the girl they wanted; now I'm starting to think otherwise. Especially now that I have no clue what to do!

I frowned in confusion and frustration, the only thing I can think of is actually talking to her about it. The only problem is I don't want it to get all weird and awkward. That would be horrible, not to mention we kind of have to stick together.

If it got awkward, I couldn't stay around her as often as I do now. I need to in a way, I'm terrified of being by myself in that house, even when Mr. L. isn't home, and I don't want to leave Robin by herself either.

I know I was clinging a little, but she never mentioned anything about it. I'm pretty sure she knows why I stick close. She's been helping me. She tells me about some of the foster homes she has stayed in before and I honestly can't grasp staying in some of them. She also has had good foster parents, but she told me she never got to stay in any of those because she always caused trouble.

I think she was just scared of getting close to nice people and getting hurt. I voiced my theory and she shot it down, claiming she isn't scared of anything. I retaliated saying everyone is afraid of something. She ignored me for a few hours, but got over it. I didn't mention it again, but I'm sure I struck a chord because of her reaction.

I knew if anything was going to happen between us, I'd have to take it really slow. That's fine by me, I don't mind. I know she's against getting attached and after everything she's been through, I don't blame her.

I'll just take things real slow and hope they turn out for the best.

Robin tore me from my thoughts of her by announcing that we had arrived. I looked up at none other than the diner we go to almost every day.

"The surprise is at Raymond's?"

"Yes," she told me.

We walked inside and I heard a chorus of, "Ponyboy!" I turned my head quickly and my eyes widened at the sight of the gang and my brothers. A huge smile spread across my face and I quickly thanked God all the bruises I had had healed before I got to see my brothers. I felt a small amount of irritation towards myself that I was thinking something like that when my family was here.

I looked at Robin, "Thank you." She flashed me one of my favorite smile, the one that lit her whole face up. I walked over and Soda and Darry wrapped me in a hug. I didn't care if it wasn't tough, I hugged them back tightly. After saying hello to everyone and we all calmed down (meaning Two-  
Bit, who jumped up and down, punching my arm the whole time).

"Well, how have you been, Pone? Tell us everything," Soda said, his smile looked painful it was so big.

I chuckled, "Sure, I will," I glanced around and found Robin talking to waitress over at the counter. I caught her eye and motioned for her to come on over. "Guys, this is Robin."

They all greeted her, I think everyone was shocked when she didn't blush as Soda took her hand and kissed the back of it.

"Whoo, the first broad who hasn't swooned over your charm, Soda!" Steve hooted, causing everyone to laugh, including Robin.

She smiled like a lazy cat, "I play hard to get."

"Really? I bet I could win you over if I wanted," Dally said cockily.

"Go ahead and try, I always win the games I play and I always get what I want," Robin purred back.

"Well, you've met your match, Princess." Robin laughed in response, sliding into the chair next to me. I felt jealous when she flirted with Dal, but I shouldn't be surprised for her to go for someone like Dally. My jealously softened when she threw her arm across the back of my chair, leaning on the back legs of her chair.

"You just went back to school this week, didn't you?" Darry asked.

"Yeah, midterms are coming up. I've been studying, I ain't too worried. How's it back in Tulsa?" I asked.

"Tulsa is the same as always," Darry responded, I nodded satisfied; I didn't want anything to change. I wanted to go back there and everything be the same as I left it.

"How about you, Robin?" Darry asked.

She cocked an eyebrow, "School? School is school, boring and mind numbing," she grinned.

"I like school, its fun," Two-Bit laughed.

"You're a weirdo, Two-Bit. Who in their right mind likes school?" Robin retorted.

"Well I do, and Ponyboy does," Two-Bit said flashing a crooked grin. I grimaced, Two-Bit's flirting grin. I guess Robin, in his opinion, was pretty enough to flirt with even though she isn't blonde.

"No, I don't. I go and get good grades because I have to, but I'd rather be anywhere else than school," I said.

"See, even nerd-boy doesn't want to go to school," Robin teased me, smirking. All those walls were back up now.

I glared at her, "You take the same classes as me."

"Yeah, and I'm year older." We glared at one another while the gang laughed at our antics.

The rest of the afternoon was filled with laughter. Robin and I showed them all around Oklahoma City. We avoided anywhere close to the Lucas' place. I even introduced Brian, Todd, Beth, and Kelly to the gang. I was surprised how easily we meshed together.

Soda is thanking Brian for letting me use his address and stuff, Brian blew it off as no big deal. Though, he knew very well it was a big deal to all of us. Without him, I wouldn't have any contact with my brothers except an occasional five minute phone call at lunch.

I almost wanted to cry when they had to leave that night. It was almost as bad as when I got on the train to come here, but then Robin wrapped her arm around my shoulder, "You'll see them again. You will get through it all, maybe they'll be up here again soon. It's not goodbye, it's see you later," I sighed sadly as we walked back to the house.

* * *

Aw, isn't it nice to see the gang again? I think they deserve some reviews, and some votes on the poll (if you haven't already, it'll be closed tonight).


	16. Orange? Green?

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

Hey readers, yeah I **changed the rating to M**. I only did this because of the violence, it's **just for safety**. I'm not going to add anything that's really adult themed or anything; it's just the child abuse. It's kind of hard rating, trying to find the difference between teens and adults. I also changed the rating because of cursing.

Also, keep reviewing! I want to reach a hundred so bad! My other story, already finished, has 99. It annoys me so bad!! Haha, anyway, thanks for everything readers, you keep me going. Also, I do accept anonymous reviews.

**Poll results**: Mr. L. is going to go too far and it's going to change Ponyboy's life. Dun dun dun.

(PPOV)

* * *

I sat in front of the window in my bedroom. Snow was falling slowly, making everything have this soft glow. The white substance glistened in the few rays of sunlight that managed to get through the blanket of gray clouds that spewed the white fluff.

Some people say it makes the world look cold. Everything in the city looked like hues of white and gray in the winter, making things depressing. Personally, I liked it. To me, everything looked angelic. The white pureness when the snow first fell. It was like the world was being cleansed.

Of course, the snow lost its angelic luster once it turned brown from cars and people walking on it. But, when it first fell, it was glorious. I don't know how people don't find beauty in snow. I guess some can't get passed the cold or wetness.

I heard a lot of Vietnam veterans can't stand the cold. It all has to do with the high temperatures of the jungle. I feel bad that they have to go through everything they go through overseas, but it's a shame that it takes away things like this. They can't even appreciate this, but who can blame them?

I worry everyday about Vietnam. I want it over with. Now that Darry doesn't have to take care of me, they can draft him. They could draft him before, but he had an excuse not to go. If he got drafted now, he doesn't have any excuse. He can't afford to go to Canada, though I doubt he'd leave with me here and Soda here. He doesn't go to college, so he doesn't have that to pardon him.

They'd make him go, and the thought makes me sick. I've seen the footage they show on television, I've read articles in the newspaper; I've heard the conversations between concerned mothers. I've also heard the talks between older classmen at school.

Soda, Johnny, and Steve were only a little over a year away from being of drafting age. Darry already is, along with Two-Bit and Dallas. It scares me bad to think of them in that environment. It scared me that they could die in war, in pain, without anyone by their side.

That has to be the worse way to go. One thing about my parents, they had each other when they went. I thank God that they went together. I don't know if one survived, if they'd been able to deal with the lost of the other. Especially, if it were my Dad who survived the crash and my Mom didn't.

Dad cherished everything he had between him and Mom. They loved one another. Dad was a loving man and devoted to whatever he put his mind to, and I think losing my Mom would've crushed him beyond repair. They'd been together since high school; I don't even know if they remember how to function without the other by their side.

It's a beautiful thing to see, love like that, beautiful like the snow when it first falls. It's pure and angelically wonderful. But, what happens when you lose that love? Do you go back to the way it used to be? Of course not, you're changed by that point. Just like as time goes by, the snow melts leaving the bare dirt in its wake, hardly anything compared to the glistening fluff that had been there not too long ago.

"A penny for your thoughts," Robin said, coming in without knocking.

"I could've been getting dressed, knock or something."

"I did, you just didn't hear me," she chuckled. "I repeat, penny for your thoughts."

"Thinking about my parents and how I'm happy that they went together and how nice the snow is."

She raised an eyebrow, "Well, the snow is nice, but a little cold for my tastes. What do you mean about your parents?"

"I'm happy they went together because I don't think they could live without the other. They loved each other a lot and had been together since high school, I doubt they'd be able to deal with the grief of losing the other," I told her quietly.

"That's got to be one of the most selfless things I ever heard. Most kids would bitch about not having their parents around, not to mention losing them both at once, yet your thinking about them first. I don't think I would have ever thought about it that way, if I were in your position that is."

I blushed a little at her comment, I didn't want praise. I was just stating the truth. "I think you would. Everyone wants what is best for those they love."

"No, Pone, not everyone." I knew she was right. I know, sometimes, my views are more optimistic than realistic. I love to let myself think that somewhere deep inside people like Mr. Cade and Mr. Lucas they really do care about the people they're hurting. I like to believe there is a shred of humanity in them; just that humanity isn't loud enough to drive away the monster, the hurt and angry side, that they take out on others. It's just the people they should care about the most that are too close, have to take the brunt of the blow.

"I do know," I eventually said. "I just like to think it isn't like that, even though I've seen it for myself my entire life."

"Johnny?" She asked.

"I've seen Johnny abused for years and I've seen Mr. Cade deal out the abuse. The same sick cycle my whole life, but I like to delude myself into thinking that there is still some good in people like that."

"Some of them, but most of them don't care," Robin murmured.

We lapped into silence. It was times like these that I enjoyed. We didn't have to fill the silence with pointless conversations and pretences. It was just the two of us, content in each other's company. I never felt this peaceful and easy going with anyone outside my family.

Then again, I guess I'd have to consider Robin the closest thing to family I have out here. It's nice not to feel so alone now. I first came here back in October; it's now past New Year's. The worst Holidays of my life. Not only did I have to be away from my brothers, not only was it only the second set of Holidays without my parents, but I had to spend it with a drunkard who has a temper problem.

"What's your favorite color?" I asked, out of the blue.

She gave me a funny look, "I guess I like purple and green the most. My bedroom was purple when I lived with my Mom. You?"

"Orange."

"Why the hell do you like orange?"

"Why the hell do you like green?"

We both laughed. It was pretty stupid, us glaring at one another over our favorite colors. Here I thought I wasn't in kindergarten anymore.

Robin got tired of sitting on the floor by my feet. She hopped up and jumped into my lap. I felt my heart start to pound and began to wonder about her motives once again.

"What is your favorite food?" She asked me.

"I don't know. I guess I like hamburgers."

"Standard American meal," she laughed. "I like steak, a juicy garlic steak, yum! My mouth is watering thinking about it, and of course you have to have fries on the side," she grinned.

"We playing twenty questions?" She nodded. "Between the two of us, we're going to kill a lot of cows." Oh God, can I sound anymore stupid?

"What's your favorite sport?" I asked quickly, hoping she didn't think I sounded like a complete dumb ass.

"Sports to play, or sports to watch?"

"Both and that's two questions," I said.

"No way am I counting, who keeps track of questions in twenty questions. It always ends up being like fifty questions. To answer your question, I like to swim and I like to watch football."

"Football? My brother Darry played in high school. Me and the gang played every Saturday, even after my parents died. When my Mom was alive, she would have lunch waiting for us when we got back to our house. It was always a lot of fun."

"That's cool. I don't know all the rules of football, and no offence to you or anything, but I always found it hilarious that 250 pound men tackle each other over a ball. But, I'll admit it, I get into it and yell at the top of my lungs sometimes," Robin laughed. We were close enough that I could feel her breathing.

I chuckled, "I see your point, and how can someone not get into the hype of a football game? It's practically impossible."

"Hmm, next question, when is your birthday?" She asked.

"May 8," I told her. "How about you?"

"April 21, our birthdays are pretty close together," she noted. "What do you like to do for fun?"

"Read, draw, watch movies, and sometimes I would play my Mom's piano or my Dad's guitar. They taught me how to play when I was younger; I stopped playing after they died though."

"You can play the guitar and piano! That's awesome; I wish I could play an instrument. I've seen your sketches before, they're really good," Robin grinned.

I flushed a little, "Thanks. What do you like to do?"

"Hang out with people. Like you, I like to read. I hate how in English they make you analyze every line; I like to read for the story."

"Sometimes the analyzing is the point of the book," I argued.

"Oh you mean with books like _The Old Man and the Sea_? That entire book is symbolism and sucks if you don't catch it. I hated that book and I don't think it deserved a Nobel Prize," she grumbled. "It had a horrible story line, the old guy goes fishing, has a heart attack trying to reel a giant fish in, and after all that the sharks eat the fish and he still has nothing. It was so boring."

"The symbolism and literary elements were amazing, that alone makes it deserve the prize."

We both glared at each other, neither of us relenting. Both of us were stubborn so when we did disagree the argument could last awhile. The mood started to shift and my eyes dropped to her lips.

I was suddenly ultra aware of our position, I could hear her breathing, and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. Excitement bubbled in my stomach and my hand tingled where I touched her cheek.

We leaned back and stared at each other. Robin laid back and rested her head on my shoulder.

Man, I was feeling pretty damn good for the first time since I got here.

* * *

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	17. Dark Abyss

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

I was waiting for Robin outside of the school's main building. I leaned against the side, smoking a cigarette that Todd gave me before he left. Robin and I were together and, I was loving it. It came as a bit of a shock to Todd and Brian. Kelly and Beth claimed they waited forever for it to happen. I guess they knew how I felt before I did, I don't understand women.

I never had a girlfriend before and everything was new. The whole experience is an enigma, which makes me nervous that I'll do something wrong.

But, Robin told me to quit fretting (I was kind of embarrassed she could tell I was worrying about doing something wrong, but thrilled at the same time that she was paying attention to me). Now I just went with the flow and I was happy.

I can't believe I actually found happiness in this place. I never thought I would. It's hard for me to believe that when I first met Robin, I thought she was an annoying, bitchy girl. I feel bad that I thought stuff like that about her.

I really shouldn't feel bad though. Apparently, Robin thought I was a goody goody with no back bone. Great to know she thought so highly of me. I guess we both weren't too good at judging one another's characters.

If you asked either of us a few months ago if we'd end up going steady, we would have laughed our asses off.

I felt two hands take me by my shoulders and pin me against the wall. I smiled, knowing it was Robin. She leaned against me and kissed me, her tongue asking for admission, which I joyfully permitted.

She leaned back, smirking, and licked her lips. I placed my hands on her hips, "What was that for? Not that I'm complaining or anything," I said, smiling widely.

She laughed, "Of course you're not complaining, I know how to please," she teased. "I don't know what that was, I just felt like it. You know, got to keep things interesting."

"Bored already?" I said in mock horror.

Taking my hand, she laughed, "Nah. How was school?"

"Dull, I think the teachers are paid to suck the life out of their students," I murmured.

"Yeah, I know. I hate coming back after break. It makes the day seem so long, then you get a weekend and it's over before I can do anything I want to," she pouted at me.

"Sorry, I can't do anything about it, wish I could. Maybe, but this is just a guess to what your problem may be, if you didn't sleep the entire weekend away you'd have time to do other stuff. I know that sounds crazy, but you might want to consider it," I chuckled at her scowl.

"No one likes a wise ass, Ponyboy."

"Hypocrite," I shot back.

"Never claimed anyone liked me," she sang. I gave her the are-you-crazy look.

She just laughed.

XXX

I freeze at the sight before me when Robin and I enter the house.

Mr. L. is looking awfully angry and Mrs. L. looks terrified. Robin and I share a brief look. He shouldn't be home yet, it's only three o'clock and he's as drunk as can be.

He smiles at us, "Hey, kids, get your asses over here."

I glance behind me, wondering if we can make a dash for the door. I reach over and wrap my hand around Robin's forearm. She looks at me and sees that I'm freaking out and mouths 'it's alright.' But, I know this isn't true. I don't know if she realizes it, but Mr. Lucas is more off than usual.

He stumbles towards us. I swallow, taking a stance of nonchalance as he stands at six foot two, a good half foot at least taller than me. His stance alone is intimidating, damn; sometimes I wish I was the size of Darry. People take one look at Dar and know not to mess with him; I wish I had that intimidation factor.

I don't though. Nothing about me is remotely intimidating to assholes like Mr. Lucas.

That's when I see Mr. L.'s arm. Robin sees it too and looks at me wide eyed; he has track marks with black blue bruises surrounded them. Holy shit. My mind races for a moment, I knew he drank but I didn't know about the drugs. I feel fear shiver down my spine.

"So nice of you two to ask how my day is. Haven't you been taught any manners?" He sighed, then smiled, looking oddly happy. I don't think I've ever seen him look anything near happy, my stomach starts to turn and Robin's grip tightens unconsciously on my arm.

"How was your day?" Robin asked, I could hear the mocking sarcastic tone underneath and I hoped that Mr. L. didn't catch it.

"How sweeeeeet, since w-when are you a suck up, Rob-in?" He slurred.

She didn't answer. She didn't know how to approach him when he was like this. I don't think he's been high around Robin before. We were definitely trending in unknown waters. He seemed to be thinking then grinned like the Cheshire Cat.

His hands struck out and grabbed a hold on the two of us. Automatically, we started to struggle and fight back. Nearly loose, he cursed and grabbed us hard by our necks. I froze, if I moved he'd press too hard and I could pass out. No way in hell did I want to be unconscious next to him.

Robin growled, knowing she wasn't in the position to struggle but squirmed anyway. I shot her a panicked look, trying to convey to her to just quit fighting and wait for an opening. I love the fact she fights for everything, but she needs to learn when to fold the cards and when to bet big or she's going to lose everything.

Thankfully, she stopped. "Gooood, kiddies." I caught sight of Mrs. L.'s horrified expression. She silently shook her head, tears falling. He didn't even acknowledge her. He dragged us both down the hall and opened a door. I never opened it and I don't know where it leads too.

He pulled it open and all I saw were a couple steps leading into a dark abyss. I gulped, it was the basement, he was going to throw us into the basement?!

Robin looked pissed and I think I saw fear somewhere in the depths of her eyes. I know I looked like I was about to shit my pants. No way did I want to be locked in the basement. When would he let us out? Will we be fed? Water? School?

My mind raced at a hundred miles per hour. I started struggling. I should've told Soda and Darry about this when they were here. I should've told Johnny, he would've understood and helped me tell the rest of them. I'll admit I felt ashamed I couldn't stand up for myself. I'd lost a lot of confidence in my skills, I always knew I wasn't the best fighter but I thought I was decent. I thought I stood a chance in a fight, I thought I'd at least be able to scrap fight if worse came to worse. Yet, I'm being manhandled.

I am being manhandled right now. This drug addict/alcoholic had knocked me unconscious before and is currently holding me by my neck. He's hurting my girlfriend and I can't even do anything. I can't protect myself, Robin, or Mrs. Lucas. I feel like such a failure.

I continued struggling and Mr. L. laughed. "Who firssst?" He asked himself. The hold was painful, Robin and I would have bruises from this for sure. I was starting to feel desperate.

Mr. Lucas directed his gaze to me and I flinched, causing him to laugh. Great, not only am I scared but he knows it, too. I can't even fake being tough. "Ponyboy, here's a welcome home," he smiled crazily, showing yellow rotting teeth.

He threw me; I rolled down the stairs, losing consciousness before I hit the bottom.

XXX

I groan softly, my body aches and I struggle to remember why.

I gasp as images from earlier race through my mind. Wait, how much earlier is earlier? How long have I been out? I see a small window; I could see the stars outside. I must've been out for a few hours.

Robin?!

Startled, I look around. Beside me, Robin is laying, she's still unconscious. My stomach turns and I send a prayer up, hoping she doesn't need immediate medical attention and wakes up soon. I look her over and don't find anything too bad. Just a shit load of bruises, which I'm sure I look no better. After being thrown down the stairs, you got to expect some bumps.

I swear softly, it's fucking dark and the moon light isn't exactly shining brightly.

I swallow; my throat is so dry that it is painful. I'm grateful that I still have my coat on, it's freezing down here.

_I really am in Hell now aren't I?_

I gently stroke Robin's face and whisper, "Robin, come on. This ain't the time to be stubborn, wake up." I sigh, knowing this is probably useless. I look around, trying to find a way out of here. The only way is the window, I can't fit, my shoulders are too broad.

Robin might fit, but she has to wake up first. She could leave me here; if no one is here she can sneak back in and get me out. Then, we could just leave. Get the fuck away from this place. Leave it behind, its Mrs. L.'s choice to stay; you can't help someone who doesn't want help.

I sit up and shiver. I shift Robin so she won't be as stiff when she wakes up. I really care about Robin but, I still can't stand when she complains. And, I know we already have a shit load to complain about, stiffness doesn't need to be added to the list.

I look around the basement, looking for anything that could be of any help. Nothing. There isn't even a piece of paper and pen to throw into the neighbor's yard for help. There isn't a way to get any message to anyone. I regret not saying anything to anyone about Mr. Lucas.

He can't keep us here forever.

If he wants to, we're as good as dead.

* * *

Please excuse typos.

Well, I leave you off on that happy note. I did not see this chapter heading in that direction, it just happened. Just so you know, this is building up for the big moment, I just got to get there.

Have a Merry Christmas, a wonderful Christmas Eve, and Happy Holidays to everyone. The next update may be a little later than usual because of Christmas and the day after I have the Christmas Ball for my school.

Anyway, thanks for your reviews, favorites, alerts, it is all very encouraging. Please keep it up.


	18. Kiss Ass

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

Three days. We've been stuck in this cellar for three fucking days. Robin did wake up, only with a massive headache. I was sure she had a concussion. I'm not exactly sure of all the signs, side effects, and issues that come with concussions.

I remember once when Two-Bit had one, he hit his head when he fell off the porch. My Dad brought him to the hospital and basically said he had a concussion. I don't know how you diagnose a concussion; I know you can be dizzy, nauseous, have headaches and memory problems. There are other symptoms too, but I don't know them.

Robin doesn't have any memory problems, though, I think she wishes she does. She's pissed off to the max, acting like a caged animal. She hates being stuck down here, so do I, but I can handle sitting here. Robin is pacing around and calling Mr. L. every name under the sun.

Though, she has been having headaches and dizziness. I don't know if this is from the overall situation and the fact we haven't had anything more than some bread Mrs. L. somehow snuck down here. She probably threw the half of loaf of bread when Mr. L. was in the bathroom or sleeping. I wish she had let us out, but maybe she's just trying to save her own skin. Anyway, just to be safe with Robin, every time she goes to sleep, I wake her up a couple hours later.

I remembered that from Two-Bit, all he wanted was to sleep but we had to wake him up. The thing is I couldn't remember if it was every two hours or three. So, I've been waking her up every two to be safe, with the help of my Dad's old wrist watch that I have. I don't think the lack of sleep is helping with her anger issues. I swear, sometimes she acts like I want to be down here.

I don't want to be down here anymore than her. It's just I accepted the fact we're stuck and she hasn't or won't. I'm not going to pace a hole in the floor when I know it's not going to help anything. We've looked throughout the basement, more than once, for something to get us out of here. There isn't anything, so yeah, I'm sitting back and waiting for a break.

Robin's goddamn rants are started to get on my nerves. Don't get me wrong, she's a sweetheart when she wants to be, but watch out when she's is pissed. And oh boy, she is now, and Mr. L. isn't around for her to take her anger out on. But I am, lucky me!

"Robin, doll, you just got to wait for the chance to get out, maybe they'll accidently leave the door unlock and we can make a run for it. We can head back over to Tulsa and stay with my buddies, or something because this place is fucked up." I grumbled at her.

"No shit it's fucked up. Where have you been?" She snapped. See what I mean. Is there really a reason to be so mean to me? I drew in a deep breath, trying to be patient. For God's sake, she is the older, the supposedly more mature one, yet I have to be calm and reasonable. Our roles got switch somewhere along the lines.

A couple days ago, we found out why Mr. L. is acting like this. Apparently, he lost his job. I can't say that's really a huge surprise, he must come in hung over half the time and I doubt he can be much of a pleasure at work considering his behavior here. I can't get over the fact that he goes out and buys drugs instead of looking for a job.

Now there isn't any income, yet he's spending money on drugs to shoot up with. Drugs aren't known for being cheep and he doesn't have money to spare. At least, I doubt they do, I don't know what they have saved up. However, the other night I heard the two discussing bills and money, so it leads me to expect money isn't exactly a plentiful source.

"Will you please relax," I said to no avail. "I know you're upset, so am I, but we can't do anything about it now." I got up and gently rubbed the tops of her arms, hoping to sooth her a little bit. I wrapped my arms around her waist and rocked back and forth, resting my chin on the top of her head, she sighed heavily.

"I've been through a lot of shit, but I've never been locked up against my will. I can't believe he's this horrible, I didn't think he would ever do this. I'm pissed at myself for not judging his character right. I hate that he caught me off guard; this shit doesn't happen to me. A lot of shit does, but being caught by surprise does not," she said, nearly in tears.

_I _was caught off guard with the sudden tears. She turned around and buried her face in my chest; I rubbed her back, murmuring sweet nothings in her ears. "Pony," she mumbled.

"Yeah?"

"You're starting to stink," she choked out a laugh.

I blushed, "I know, but you're still stuck with me."

"That's okay, I don't care. Are you sure there isn't anything to get us the hell out of here," she said hopelessly, frowning sadly. I smiled a little and nodded. There wasn't anything but junk down here. She laid her head back on my chest and yawned.

"Want to try to sleep some?" I asked her, we had been switching off. Not only because I was afraid she had a concussion, but incase Mr. L. made an appearance.

"No, you'll just wake me up in five minutes," she said, our moment of peace over as her mood swung.

There was a thud against the door and both our heads snapped up towards the door, our way to freedom. Then the voice I dreaded the most came tittering downward, "Are you kids having fun?" He laughed sardonically.

Robin's anger got the better of her because she yelled back, "You son of a bitch! What about school, huh? Or are you too stupid to think that far? Our friends will know something is up dumbass!"

He just laughed in return, "Shut up you whore, as far as your school is concerned, you are being home schooled. You are no longer students at Oklahoma High, but my students. First lesson, don't talk when the teacher doesn't want you to. Second lesson, break the rules and you get punished," the creep was really enjoying himself.

"What about food and water," I yelled at him, or a bathroom, I added mentally. I won't tell you what we've been doing for that problem so far.

He stood blocking the doorway. A part of me wanted to run and just shove him out of my way, the problem is he isn't small by any means. He could just shove back and I'll go flying down the stairs again. I still hurt from the last tumble.

"When you learn to be good little boys and girls, you will get rewarded," he said, sickly sweet.

"Food isn't a goddamn reward, neither is water. It's a mean of surviving or not. Do you want to end up starving us to death!?" Robin growled. I guess we've been thinking along the same lines. I was worrying about the same thing.

He laughed again, "I guess you better be good then." With that, he shut the door, enclosing us in darkness.

I looked over to where sunshine was filtering through a dirty window. We could open it, but neither of us could fit through it. If we had a way to get the frame out, there wouldn't be a problem. My shoulders were too broad to fit. Robin's hips were too wide, she was sure she would get stuck. I wasn't sure; I think she may be able to fit.

"Want to try going through the window?" I asked her.

"I already told you, my hips are too big and my ass is too wide to get through that window, unless we got the frame off. But, we need tools to get the frame off. What kind of basement doesn't have any tools?" She responded.

"I think you can fit."

"Well you think wrong. I'll probably get stuck and then be laying there half in the basement and half out. I'd rather be here then stuck half way out the window," then under her breath, "Seeing how we're getting no food, give it a few days and I'll probably fit and so will you." She had a point there.

Glumly, I said, "I wish I told my brothers about this. I knew the guy was an abusive freak, he pounded my head in. That alone should've been enough motivation to tell them about this."

"Pony, you just didn't want them to worry anymore than they already were. I know you just wanted to protect them because you know they would've never let you go back to this place if there was any chance of you getting hurt. Don't beat yourself up over it, I didn't ever think Mr. L. would go this far. I never thought he did drugs or anything either and I've lived with him longer than you," Robin said, trying to make me feel better. I can't say it did.

"That's true, but there's more to it. I feel ashamed that some guy, just one guy, is throwing me around like a rag doll. I can't fight for myself, you, or Mrs. Lucas," I felt myself flush when I admitted my true feeling.

Robin groaned, "Pony, goddamn, you're fourteen! You can't expect that much from yourself. You can't save the world. I understand how you're feeling, but no one would ever think you had to protect me and Mrs. L. from someone like _him._ Your family and friends wouldn't see it that way, they'd want to help and protect you."

"I know all that. I know they would never think I wasn't tough or that I was a incompetent kid who can't do shit for himself. It's just how I feel about it. I'm sorry I let him hurt you. You know that right?"

Her eyes softened, she came over and sat in my lap. "Ponyboy, I don't need anyone to look out for me. There is no way in hell that anyone would think you were incompetent, because you aren't by any standards. But, by God if that isn't one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me."

I looked at her, "You're my girl, of course I want to protect you. It's a guy thing, protect what's yours."

"You think I'm yours," she said raising an eyebrow.

I smiled sheepishly at her. She grinned, she was teasing me, she knew what I meant. She quickly leaned down and gave me a chaste peck on the lips. I sighed, laying my forehead against her shoulder.

"Pone, what should we do?" Robin asked after a little while of silence.

"Kiss ass," I answered. "I don't want to anymore than you do, believe me. But, we're going to have to stipple our pride if we want to get out of here. I don't know about you, but I don't want to starve to death or die from dehydration. I heard it was a bit painful."

She was taking a little longer than I liked to think over what I said. "Are you actually thinking of still telling him off or acting up? If you do we'll starve," I said incredulously.

"I can't help it," She cried. "I don't submit to people. I don't bow down to their rules and break my back for them. I don't want to!"

"If you don't we'll die, slowly and painfully," I said, making sure she was listening to what I was saying. It was crazy to consider doing anything else. Why would you want to die like that just to prove a point? She was taking stubborn to a whole new level, a level of insanity. To be honest, if she wanted to go down, I don't think I wanted to go down with her.

I know all she really has is her pride, but is it worth death? I don't think so. I know I'm stubborn and I have my family to live for and she doesn't, but seriously?!

"I can take pain. I don't care; I'd rather die than bow down to t-that scum!" She crossed her arms defiantly.

"But, I wouldn't. You go down, you know he'll make me go down with you and I don't want to. I want to get out of here and back to my brothers and the gang. Get over your pride, you're being stubborn! I can't believe you're contemplating between death and listening to someone else besides yourself," I said, to me it was a no brainer.

She swallowed, "It's the principle of the thing. I don't want to die, don't get me wrong. I just don't want to listen to the bastard more."

"Then do it for me. Do it for my brothers, and the gang. Listen to him and we'll get food and water. That way we live and eventually he'll slip up, which you know he will, and we'll get out of here. You just got to play by his rules for now; he'll lose in the end. You got to look at the big picture, not what's right in front of you," I said so fast I was stumbling over the words.

We stared at one another for a long period of time. She slowly nodded, "I'll suck it up for you and your family. I won't, can't, get in the way of you guys getting back together. Plus, I wouldn't let him do that to you anyway. He'd probably give you food and keep me locked up, you won't get hurt."

"But he wouldn't, it's either both of us or neither of us. He wouldn't give me anything because he knows I'd share it with you."

"I see that. Sorry, I let my stubbornness get the better of me," she mumbled, gazing at her feet.

We sighed together. We'd do what we had to get out of here, even if that meant kissing ass.

* * *

Yay, I got this up faster than I thought I'd be able to. Hope you had a good Christmas. Review!


	19. Blood Bath

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(Third Person POV)

* * *

The two teenagers shifted on the hard cold floor of the dusty basement. Both were bored out of their minds. So what do two teenagers who are of the opposite gender do when they're bored? Make out, a lot, of course.

Robin pulled away from Pony and laughed, "Bonding is important in any relationship and so is common ground, who knew we bond over being locked in the basement of our foster family's house."

Pony rolled his eyes at her, "Most people would probably be freaking out right now, yet we make out instead. Maybe there's something wrong with us," his head rolled lazily over to face her.

"Probably the fact we haven't eaten anything in five days," Robin muttered bitterly.

Ponyboy rubbed her back, trying to comfort her, "At least they gave us some water," he murmured, trying to convince himself he wasn't going to die like this. After his parents died, he thought about his own death. He didn't think about it in detail, but he contemplated different ways that he could die the next day.

Being locked in the basement, starving to death, in a foster care home was never one of them. Nothing like this ever passed through his mind. Pony looked away, unable to hide his own bitterness anymore. He was trying to stay hopeful and optimistic for the both of them but after sitting there in smelly dirty clothing in a cold basement, his limited source of hope was in dire need of replenishing.

But, the only way for his spirits to lift would be to get out of here. Once he gets out of here everything will be alright, well that's what he thinks.

Robin just sat back, unhappy. Her entire life has been fight after fight, filled with struggling and heartache. After her Mother died, all she felt was sadness and a deep hatred for whoever killed her. Now the man upstairs was torturing her in ways he couldn't imagine.

Being stuck down there made her feel stuck. In order to get out of there she had to make sure to make Mr. Lucas happy, if it weren't for Pony she would've just fought him. Being trapped and sucking up reminded her of all those years trying to please her Father.

She loved her Dad. As a little girl she was always Daddy's girl, she loved playing in the mud watching him work in the yard. The best part would be when he finished and came and scooped her up, muddy clothes and all. He would kiss her cheek and tell her how much he loved her and ask her how much she loved him, she would stretch her tiny arms as far as she could.

She missed that part of him. She didn't know where or how it went all wrong. He just left, he didn't love her anymore? She never understood. All Robin wanted was that hug, the adoration to shine in his eyes when he looked at her. Robin didn't know where her Father was and even if she did, she knew that man was far gone.

Robin has lived the last few years of her life with a cold, analytical outlook; she was just trying to survive. She didn't realize she was looking for something more, she thought she was fine, happy even, by herself.

But then, she found out Mr. and Mrs. Lucas were bringing in a new foster child. At first she thought he was just a boy, he looked sleepy and sad. She couldn't help but think he looked like a child and figured he was a kid with no strength or fight of his own, though he did have a cool name.

Of course, after watching Pony out of the corner of her eye, she realized her first assumption was wrong. He took things with a cool and calm exterior, nothing she's ever done. He acted passive at the rowdy assholes the first day of school.

Personally, she would've pounded their faces in. In a way, the kid she deemed spineless, was stronger than her. She doesn't take bullshit while he goes on like it's not even there. He was strong, quiet, and pensive. That was new to her and she liked it.

She still never thought they'd end up together. Who knew that kid would break her hard ass ways?

But, then again, it made sense. Ponyboy gave her his undivided attention, even when she was talking about stuff that had absolutely no importance. He treated her with respect, like a gentleman, and he looked at her with soft green gray eyes that held adoration, the one thing she'd been looking for years for.

For the first time in a long time, Robin cared for someone else besides herself.

XXX

A loud, klutzy thud from above signaled that Mr. Lucas was up once again and moving around. There was yelling and a lot of noise, making the two huddled together out of fear. The two kids held their breath as they heard stumbling outside the basement door.

The door flew open, blinded them with light. A hulking dark figure blocked some of the light, allowing their eyes to adjust. The two, after a moment of disorientation, hopped up from the floor. They waited nervously for their foster care father to say something.

"Come here kiddies," Mr. L. said, gruffly.

Without saying anything the two walked up the stairs, side my side, trying to portray their united front. The two were completely bewildered. They never thought he was going to let him out. Both were floored, yet uneasy by the whole ordeal and didn't know what to think.

They were both planning on dashing out the moment they could. Earlier in the week, they agreed that if they were giving the chance, they'd make a run for it. If, for whatever reason, they had to split up and go in different directions, they were supposed to meet at the diner.

The two walked as calmly as possible up the stairs. Mr. Lucas moved out of the way in order to let the two of them through. They shared a quick look and went to make a run for it.

Both were yanked back when he took hold of their backs. The struggle began. Both started fighting with everything they had, which wasn't much do to the fact they were weak from hunger. Neither of them had a full night's sleep since they were down in the cellar, it's hard and uneven floor making in nearly impossible to do so.

Mr. L. ended up with a good hold on Ponyboy and Robin. They both went slack, waiting for a break they knew may not come.

When they entered the living room, both of their faces went pale. Robin's eyes went wide with horror and Ponyboy started breathing hard enough that he was practically dry heaving. There wasn't anything in his stomach to throw up, but if there had been he would've spewed all over the floor at his feet.

"Like it?" Mr. Lucas chuckled into their ears.

In front of them, they saw the living room walls smeared with bloody hand prints. In the middle of the room, Mrs. L. laid, not moving. She was perfectly still, too still, and there was no doubt in Ponyboy or Robin's minds that she was dead.

Her blonde curls were sprawled out on the floor, her face pale white as a ghost and her light eyes dull with the lack of life that should've been behind them. Discoloration spotted her arms and face where bruises had started to set in from her last beating, the one that ended her life too soon.

Mr. L. cackled behind them, obviously please with his work. He whispered, "Your next," and then threw Robin.

After that it was pure chaos. Haphazard blows were thrown by Robin and Pony that did nothing more than waste away their needed energy. The two fought to get to the phone or out a door or window. Both knew that only one of them needed to escape and to get some help.

The problem was neither was given a chance. Mr. L.'s drunken and drugged state seemingly didn't affect his ability to manhandle the two of them. Both were tired, weak, desperate, and knew that if they didn't do something soon it was going to become an even bigger blood bath.

With a sudden jerk of Mr. L.'s fist, Ponyboy stumbled back and fell. His head smashed into the corner of the wooden table, Robin could hear the crack and she prayed to God Pony would get back up and be okay, he didn't get up.

With a new burning fury, Robin slammed her fist square into Mr. L.'s nose. Somehow, she ended up sending him flying onto his ass. He growled, struggling to get up. Robin ran, passing Pony she noted with relief the rise and fall of his chest. She grabbed the phone and quickly dialed 911, telling the police to get here as fast as they could.

She spun around when she heard heavy footsteps. She fought bravely, but it wasn't enough. She felt the cold steel of a kitchen knife slid in between her ribs, it wasn't long before she succumbed to darkness.

* * *

Thanks for your reviews, please keep them coming. I still don't know if they should survive or not...


	20. A Tough Pill to Swallow

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(Soda's Point of View)

* * *

Darry and I sat at the table eating breakfast. Another morning, another breakfast, and another day that just felt wrong because my little brother wasn't here. Every time I turn around there is something that reminds me of him, or something else I realize I got to do because he usually does.

I feel guilty when I realized how much we had him doing. He cleaned the bathroom, our room, and most of the time he was the one who gave the kitchen a good scrubbing. Now me and Dar were trying to keep up with it all, and I'll admit my house wife skills aren't near Ponyboy's. Darry has to keep going over everything I do. In my defense, I can't help it! I just get distracted by better things to do and forget about it…sometimes on purpose.

I missed how Pony would come through in the morning (or when he first woke up) and no matter what we said he would answer with a grunt. Over the years, I learned what he meant with whatever noise he made. It would've been easier if he would just answer by talking, like a normal person, but it was Ponyboy. He has never been a morning person.

Who knew I would miss something as dumb as the fact Ponyboy isn't a morning person. I feel kind of dumb thinking about this, but I can't help it. It's just another thing missing that should be here. God I hate that woman who took him from me. Dar and I can take care of Pony no sweat; we would never lay a hand on him.

"What do you think Pony's doing now?" I asked Darry. Much to his annoyance, this has become somewhat of a habit. I don't think one day has gone by that I haven't asked him this at least once, it was worse in the beginning though, so he can't really complain.

"Well its seven o'clock on a Saturday morning, me and you both know he's asleep. Either that or whoever is taking care of him is struggling to get him up," Darry added with a grin.

I chuckled, "Nah, Pone would be better for them than us. He wouldn't want them to think him a nuisance or something," I said.

Dar looked thoughtful for a moment, but didn't say anything 'cause the phone started ringing. Both of us shared a look of confusion, who the hell is calling this early. Must be work or something, I grab our dirty dishes and start washing them in the kitchen.

I hear Darry murmuring quickly on the phone, I notice that he sounds agitated. Definitely work then, I grin to myself.

"Soda!" Darry called, I turn immediately because I hear panic in his voice.

He looks at me wide eyed and utters, "Pony." The plate in my hand drops, without another word we're out the door. I scribbled a note quickly explaining to the gang we're heading to Oklahoma City. I call work quickly, taking the day off.

I got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.

XXX

The two of us all but ran into Saint Anthony Hospital. All we knew was Pony was somewhere in here, but why I couldn't tell you. Some knew case worker had been assigned to the case, getting rid of that old wrinkly bag, and they called us.

We went to the front desk, Darry was trying to act cool and calm but I could see the concern in his eyes and his tense posture gave him away. I doubted I looked any better. I couldn't hide my feelings; I bounced from foot to foot as the lady looked up Pony's name and all of that. Could she be any slower about it?

She scanned the two of us over, "He's in the Pediatric Unit, room 103."

"Thank you," Darry murmured, politely.

We headed off without saying anything, both of us caught up in our own thoughts. Pony can be awfully clumsy sometimes and I couldn't help but wonder if this was his fault. There are more than a few incidents where we had to go to the hospital as kids because Pony hurt himself.

I remember the one time where he tripped over his own feet and bashed his face on the edge of the table. His nose just kept on bleeding and eventually Ma and Dad got so worried that we all had to go over to the hospital. He was fine, but there are a lot of accidents like that.

He was better when he got older, but maybe his good streak is over. Hopefully, I'm worrying for nothing. That's what I'm trying to convince myself, but for some reason it's not working.

There was a young guy sitting in a chair outside of Pony's room. He has some paperwork in his lap and a briefcase at his feet. Darry and I slowed are pace as we approached the door. The guy flashed a small grin and asked, "Are you two Pony's brothers?"

"Yes we are, I'm Darrel Curtis and this Sodapop," Darry answered.

The guy nodded, "I can tell, family resemblance. I'm his new case worker, Alexander Frangello," he reached a hand out and shook both our hands. I wanted to get this over with and go see my little brother; I could really care less about Franny here.

"I saw your case and I know you're not supposed to be anywhere near him, but I didn't agree with the decision made. Technically, I can get fired for this, so please keep this between us," Franny said.

We both nodded. "How is he? Can we see him? Where are Mr. and Mrs. Lucas?" Darry shot off questions.

The case worker's face turned grim, he looked down at his feet. Dar and I shared panicked looks.

"Pony is a ward of the state, meaning they have custody of him for now; Mr. Lucas's guardianship has been revoked due to charges of first degree murder for two people, one being his wife and the other Robin McLaren. Other charges include attempted murder, child abuse, child neglect, and others may be added later on," he said, straight faced.

I stumbled back with a thump against the wall. Darry looked completely horrified. My baby brother...was...a-abused? No he would've told us when we saw him! How could this have happened?

I shook my head in denial.

"How is he?" Darry asked again, his voice cracking. I could tell he didn't want to believe that the man Pony had been living with for almost half a year was this sick. He killed Robin, she was fine and he killed her. I liked her too; she was such a smart ass it was funny to watch her and Dally go back and forth.

He ran a nervous hand through his hair, "Well you said two murder charges so he ain't dead right!?" I exclaimed in panic. It was completely irrational considering the lady at the front desk told us he was in the room right next to me; I just realized this a little late.

"No, he's not dead. There are signs of malnutrition, he's dehydrated, but the biggest concern is his head injury. He has severe head trauma, it appears he hit it on the edge of a table. His skull cracked and fragments plunged themselves into his brain tissue. He was immediately brought in to have open head surgery to remove said fragments, but while operating he slid into a comma," he said, softly.

My head spun, I didn't understand all of it but I knew it was bad. A comma, not everyone wakes up from those. Oh my God, my little brother. A little whine escaped my throat and I was startled when I realized I was crying.

I sniffed wiping away tears from my cheeks. I looked up at Darry, scared, he looked like he was in shock. His face had gone an awful pale color. My stomach churned uncomfortably.

"What now?" Dar whispered.

Even Franny looked upset by the entire thing. "We wait," he muttered. "Go on in, I won't tell anyone. Just don't touch any of the tubes. He doesn't look good," he warned.

Neither of us could care less. We turned and headed in, despite our stunned state, I think we both nearly choked when we saw Pone.

He laid completely still, his face the color of the crisp white hospital sheets behind his head. He had an IV dripping with some clear fluid and blood into his body. The bandages were wrapped tightly around his wound. I was positive that there were probably bruises and cuts all over him, then I saw something that horrified me even more. Handprint shaped bruises covered his neck.

I squeaked out, "His neck."Darry patted my back, telling me it would

Darry's eyes, impossibly, got larger. I turned and threw my guts up in the garbage can near the door. Darry patted my back and told me it would all turn out alright. How was I supposed to believe that?

I wanted to kill whoever did this to my brother. I wanted to cry and scream.

How is Pony going to deal with this?

That is if he wakes up.

* * *

Happy New Year Everyone!

Poor Ponyboy...I felt bad killing Robin, but that was my original intentions before I even typed the first chapter. I get really attached to characters so I was a little upset to do so. Any fans of Robin and Pony, don't fret, I have a story I'm going to publish about what would've happened with their relationship if she didn't die and if Pony doesn't die. So keep an eye out.

I wrote a one-shot called "Bitterness Glorifies Sweetness." It's a pretty powerful piece and it's been favorited and has a review (thanks, you know who you are) and has hits, yet barely any reviews. So please go and check that one-shot out and review it! It's about Pony coming home from 'Nam and the power of family love. It's good, I promise.

Review!!!!


	21. Best Buddies

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

First update of 2010! My last update had been an hour and a half before the New Year, haha. I had to do something to entertain myself until the ball dropped. Enjoy!

(Soda's Point of View)

* * *

It's been two weeks and there isn't any sign of change in Ponyboy's condition. To say I'm upset is an understatement. Darry and I spent last week in Oklahoma City at Pony's side. We just cleaned ourselves up in his bathroom while we were there, no sense in going all the way home to clean up. I don't mind hospitals except the smell. They're so sterile, it's creepy.

My boss was understanding about the whole thing, but 'asked' me to come back. Yeah, more like forced me. It was either come back or your fired sort of thing. He didn't want to lose any business. He is such a jackass!

Darry went back to work yesterday. He spent the beginning of the week with Ponyboy, but went back to work for the money. We can't go too long without working or we won't be able to make ends meet. I don't mind working, I don't think Dar does either, I just wish we had the ability to take off when we needed to.

I've been slacking, I know that, but I got the best buddy anyone can ask for. Steve has been saving my ass all week. He's been cleaning up my messes, and I'm real grateful. I don't know what I'd do without him.

I haven't been able to sleep well either. Hospital chairs and those little cot things they give to family members are not comfortable. It wasn't like I could sleep there anyway. I just sat there and stared at my little brother.

I still can't wrap my mind around how bad this is. He's in a coma. I hear the words, I've said them, but it's like I can't believe them. I don't want to believe them. I sighed quietly.

Two -Bit is being a real buddy. Since me and Dar couldn't stay up there with Pone, he offered to stay there with him. We told him that he could visit if he wanted, but he didn't need to stay up there. Pony was in good hands with all those nurses and doctors up there. They were taking care of him. Some of the nurses even seemed real nice. I think some of them heard what happened and felt bad for Pony.

I hope they don't show him any pity if he wakes up, he wouldn't like that. I frowned at myself, _if _he wakes up, no _when_ he wakes up. I rubbed my eyes, knowing I looked like shit.

"Hey, buddy, how's it going?" Steve slapped my shoulder as he slid by. I smiled a little bit at him.

"I'm fine, just worrying about everything you know," I shrugged.

"_Pony is a ward of the state, meaning they have custody of him for now; Mr. Lucas's guardianship has been revoked due to charges of first degree murder for two people, one being his wife and the other Robin McLaren. Other charges include attempted murder, child abuse, child neglect, and others may be added later on."_

Those words just kept echoing in my head. God, that guy murdered his wife. I couldn't ever understand how you could do that to someone you're supposed to love forever. Pony lived with that guy, I sighed, rubbing my eyes again.

Thank goodness today is a slow day. I don't think I could handle a crowd right now.

Steve squeezed my shoulder, looking concerned, "I can cover you for a bit. It's slow, why don't you try to catch some shut eye?"

I grinned, "Nah, I'm alright. You've done enough for me this week already, I know I've been messing more stuff up than I've been fixing," I muttered, apologetically.

He rolled his eyes, "You just got a lot on your mind, it ain't been that bad. Want to talk about it?"

"That guy has all those charges against him. He's being charged for neglect and abuse…That means that all happened to Pony. That psycho tried to kill him for God's sake! Jesus, I know what he's being charged with but how bad was it really? What the hell did he actually do to Pony?" I rubbed my forehead.

I whirled around quickly to look at Steve, "He didn't fucking tell me, Steve! All that and Pony never hinted or peeped a word out that would make me think something was wrong. I didn't see anything wrong with him and it was only a month, if that, when we went to see him! How didn't I know?" I wailed. I burrowed my head in my arms and groaned, holding back tears. I needed to get it together, I couldn't cry at work…at home later when I could haul up in my room.

"Soda, listen to me, it ain't your fault. You can't blame yourself for this at all and neither can Darry for that matter. This all happened, but there wasn't anything you could do about it. You didn't put him in that home and Pony didn't speak up. I don't think none of us saw this happening. Even Johnny was shocked by the whole thing and he's the kid's best bud. If he didn't notice and you didn't, then you know he was hiding it pretty good…" Steve said, trying to comfort me.

"The kid was always good at lying; he always had that poker face. Maybe, this shit didn't start until later, after we saw him. Maybe it wasn't that bad until the end and he didn't see any reason to say something. You know he wouldn't want to worry you," Steve added.

"So you're saying the guy started getting abusive out of the blue?" I snapped at him. I instantly felt bad and was about to apologize, but Steve waved it off.

"That's not what I'm saying. The kid probably stayed out of that guy's way and it was good. Then something probably happened and he took it out on Robin and Pony. My Dad has never been that great, but there are times when he's a real pain in the ass and others when we just pass each other by like nothing. Pony could've gotten there when the guy was alright, then he got pissed and all this mess happened," Steve muttered.

My nose scrunched up as I thought about Steve's theory. It made sense some. I still didn't know, no one would know until Pony told us himself. Even then, there was the possibility he wouldn't remember. He could have amnesia or even worse, brain damage.

"Don't hurt yourself thinking too hard, Soda," Steve teased. I snorted, rolling my eyes at him in mock offence.

"You might be right," I said.

"Of course I am," Steve grinned, cockily.

I sniffed, "Oh, all knowing one, will my baby brother wake up?" I said, half mocking, half serious. I didn't want the statistics and cold facts the doctors were giving us, I wanted a straight forward answer. I know Steve wouldn't have a clue, I know he'll say Pony will wake up, but it's something I want to hear.

Steve looked at me, a bit sadly. I don't care if he denies it, he does care about Ponyboy. He's just too much of a hard ass to admit it, but I can tell he does. "Pony is tough, he always has been. If he wants to wake up, he will."

"What do you mean if he wants to wake up?" I asked, warily.

"I mean, I don't know what he went through. If…," Steve took a deep breath and blew it out of his mouth. "If it was really bad, maybe he won't want to. Maybe, he'd rather live without having that in his head," Steve said, quietly. He didn't want to upset me, but he did. The worst part was he's right.

"Ugh, I wish I could be up there with him. They said talking to him could help. He's got to know Dar and me want him to wake up," I said, desperately.

Steve laid a reassuring hand on my shoulder, "Bud, you were there last week, I'm sure he knows. Right now, you got Two-Bit up there. He'll talk the kid's ear off, believe me, Two-Bit will talk enough for all of us if he's bored," he chuckled.

I smiled a little bit in return, but couldn't manage a laugh. "Well that's true."

"Ponyboy is just being his stubborn self like usual, Soda. He's taking this at his own pace, like always. He probably got distracted by something," Steve laughed loudly this time.

I couldn't help but laugh, "Dreaming about clouds and sunsets, I suppose. It must be awfully pretty if he hasn't woken up yet."

"Nice to see your back, buddy," Steve said as he headed back to the garage, whipping me with an oil stained towel on the way out.

I must've been really out of it this week.

* * *

Well, there's only a couple chapters left of this story. This chapter was supposed to show everything but, Steve and Soda wanted to talk more than I planned. It seems, they needed to show their part in this.

I have a **poll** up on my profile, check it out. It's about **what I should do next** and I think I have like eight options or something like that. **Vote**.

**Twilight fans**, I posted a **new story**. If you like Twilight, go look at it. It's about Paul and has a nice twist, I think.

Excuse typos please, and thanks for all the support, review.


	22. Eternal Promises

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(Pony's POV) What you've all been waiting for, does he die or not?

* * *

I could hear the call of my brothers' voices drifting by me. The hum of their voices sounded like a crescendo, but soon faded back again. Their words were nothing more than a slur, but it was nice knowing they were here with me.

Where is here? I wanted to look around but I couldn't remember how to open my eyes. You would think I'd panic when I realized something like that, but I didn't. I drifted in the darkness listening to the noises around me.

I heard it all as if my ears were stuffed with cotton and I had a blind fold on. It was how I imagined being in a cocoon would be like. I was a part of the world, yet shielded away from everything at the same time. It was oddly…comfortable.

Every day of my like there seems to be some small struggle or some sort of irritation during the twelve hours or so that I'm awake. People are always fighting for their place in society, but here it was just me. I had the gentle humming that reminded me what I could go to and what I was away from. It was both hell and heaven, that hum.

I was so tired of fighting…I-I'm tired period. I faded off into the blackness again…

XXX

I swam back up to the surface. I didn't feel so tired now, but I felt achy, as if I had the flu or something. I tried to shake it off; I didn't want anything puncturing my peace, especially, if that something was pain.

"Pony…" I heard a voice calling. I turned, looking for the familiar voice.

She appeared before me wearing an emerald green dress that looked like it was made of a silky material. Her hair waved around her in chaos, the way I loved it. Her expression was haunting yet beautiful. She laughed softly at my incredulous expression, _Robin_ wearing a dress?

With her index finger, she motioned me forward. I was soon in a meadow. Wild flowers flowed free and graceful in the wind. Robin's dress whipped around her knees and her hair waved along with the breeze. She picked one of the flowers and sniffed it. I came up beside her and watched as she allowed the flower to blow away.

She smiled at me and leaned in, she kissed me gently, yet with passion. She tasted like a chocolate bar, yum. "Pony," she whispered, quietly and serenely. I opened my eyes and met her swirling blue ones; they were filled with an internal peace people wish for yet rarely succeed in receiving.

"So beautiful," I murmured, running my hand down her bare arm.

She smiled, "Promise me something, please?" She questioned.

"Anything."

"Move on, forgive and forget, and live a whole and happy life," she ordered, her lips brushing against mine because we were so close.

"I don't understand?" I grumbled, uncertainly.

She brushed some reddish brown hair out of my eyes, "You don't remember what happened yet? Think back, when was the last time you and I were together, darling?"

I thought and then it all came flying back in almost no order: Mrs. L.'s dead body in the bloodied living room, the crazy look in Mr. Lucas's eyes, the basement, and everything going black as I hit my head. Where am I again? Just like that all the peace in me went out the window.

"I got to go, Ponyboy. Promise me…" Robin laid a comforting hand on my chest.

I clutched her to me, "Where are you going. Why can't you stay with me?" I asked, a note of hysteria in my voice.

"I'm not strong enough to stay, Pone." She murmured, simply, as if it explained everything. The statement just made me more confused than ever. She's the strongest person I know, what does she mean she can't stay? She can do anything; she always does what she wants.

"Don't you want to be with me?" I asked, hurt. I know I was looking like a wounded animal as I stared at her.

"God yes, I want to stay," she kissed me hard. "But, I can't," she added with a sad smile. "Now, do you promise me or not?" She right out demanded.

"I promise," I mumbled, melancholy. I didn't understand why she couldn't be with me but, I did get that wherever we were going was two different places. At least, I think.

"See you around, Pony. I love you," she kissed me again.

"I love you."

Robin faded away, leaving me by myself in the field of flowers. Slowly, one by one, they wilted. Their colorful petals fell off the stem and healthy green leaves turned brown. Soon, blackness started to slowly suck everything away and I was back to my dark abyss. It didn't seem so peaceful anymore. I wish I could hear the humming…

XXX

"Where's my baby?" A woman's voice called. My head snapped around, searching.

I spotted a woman with golden brown hair and warm brown eyes. A man stood behind her, his hand resting on her back as if it belonged there permanently. His blue eyes glowed with love and barely noticeable laugh lines showed when he grinned. They both looked so happy.

"There's my boy," the man's deep voice resonated in the open place, bringing light to the dark.

"Momma, Daddy?" I asked.

"Oh," my Mom cried. "My little baby is a man!"

The two squished me between them and hugged me, I melted into them. I rested my head on my Dad's shoulder, memorizing his sent of soap and tobacco. "Son, I missed you," my Dad murmured into my hair.

"Missed you both," I sighed. My Mom's soft laugh filled my ears, bringing back happy memories from my childhood. Some of which, I had long forgotten.

The place transformed into the living room at home. They both smiled gently at me, pride shining in both of their eyes. I sat in the middle and I didn't care if it seemed childish when I laid my head on my Mom's shoulder.

"Baby, you need to promise us something," Dad said, a smile in his voice.

Both my parents grinned down at me and I gave them a confused look. What did they want me to promise them? Robin's promise was going to be hard enough; I would miss her everyday she wasn't here. I hope I can keep her promise; will I be able to keep my parents' too?

Mom gently took my hand, "Take care of your brothers for us," she told me, seriously. "They're both young and need guidance just as much as you do. You may not think you can help them, but you can. Oh, you do every day, honey. Go home and take care of one another." My Dad nodded, emphasizing Mom's point.

"How? What could I even do to help, Darry. He's my guardian!" I exclaimed.

"You'll figure it out, you're a smart boy," Dad chuckled.

I looked at the two of them and nodded slowly, "I promise." I could at least try. I don't know what I can do to really help either of them.

The room started to break up and dissolve into the blackness again. The two of them kissed my cheeks, "We love you so much," they said in unison.

"I love you, too," I said, chocking up.

"Go, towards the light, Pone. Find your way home," their voices called from a distance.

XXX

The slow beeping noise was annoying me. I turned my head, everything in a haze, towards the sound. The slight movement of my head sent pain searing through me, I groaned.

"Pony? Hey, Pone?" Someone asked caringly…Soda maybe?

I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing for the pain to go away. The darkness hadn't hurt this bad. Can I go back there? I blinked a few times, my vision blurry. It made my stomach turn uncomfortably.

"Ponyboy?" That voice was definitely Darry's.

I slowly turned my head back towards the beeping and my brothers' voices. I realized, foggily, I actually understood what they were saying this time, it wasn't just a hum anymore. I concentrated to focus on the blurry figures on my family.

I blinked at them again, and glanced around the room. I sniffed in the sterile antibiotic smell of a hospital. I was in the hospital because of Mr. Lucas, but how were Soda and Darry allowed in here?

"Sod-a, Dar-ry," I croaked out. I hope they could hear the confusion in my tone 'cause I don't think I can talk.

Soda's eyes had happy tears shining in them; he smiled a blinding grin and said, "Yeah, it's us. It's all okay, Pony. It's all alright."

I nodded, forgetting that it would hurt my head. I couldn't remember what I had wanted to ask them…"Tired," I whispered.

Darry stroked my hand and Soda left the room, "Sleep, baby. Go on back to sleep…"

I did what I was told.

* * *

Hehe, I couldn't kill Ponyboy. It hurt me enough killing Robin.

I loved writing this chapter and it came out different and way better than I though it was going to. At first, I was going to have Pony wake up in a panic, but this all happened.

If you haven't already, go vote on my poll. I decided I will definitely be writing the one-shots to go along with this story. I already have one almost finished and will be posted after I finish this.

With that said, this story is coming to an end soon. I think they're could be 1-3 more chapters, depends on where I go with it. I might be lying though, so don't hold me to that.

Thanks for all you support, I love it. Reviews are welcomed from anyone, so please give me your feedback!


	23. Flowers For Pony

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

* * *

I rubbed my head wearily. For the first time I really took a look at the little room I had in whatever hospital I was brought to. It was the typical bare white walls. It had a stupidly cheerful flower trim thing painted at the top of the wall.

The flowers reminded me of the meadow. I knew I dreamed that, what other explanation was there? I mean, no way would Robin be in a dress, that had to be my imagination. But, at the same time, I want it all to be real so bad it hurts. Seeing my parents so _alive_ almost physically hurt.

Seeing Robin alive and well, even in my dreams, hurt too. It was a physical pain, it hurt my heart I suppose. I never cared about anyone in the way I cared about her. I lost all of that. I lost her; she really was one of my best friends already.

I swallowed; my throat thick with unshed tears. Why did she have to die? I bugged the nurses and doctors enough to finally tell me what happened. She was barely alive when paramedics arrived on the scene, they brought her into emergency surgery (much like myslef) but, she didn't make it through. The bleeding was to extensive from her wound, they couldn't compensate for the blood loss quick enough.

The door creaked as it opened, so freaking annoying. Brian, Todd, Beth, and Kelly stood in the doorway awkwardly. They were obviously uncomfortable with the hospital atmosphere, or maybe it was just because of the entire situation.

Everyone, including my brothers and Two-Bit (haven't gotten to see anyone else from Tulsa), are acting like I'm going to break any second. It doesn't matter if it's something physical, like getting up to go to the bathroom, or if it's something like answering questions for the police.

I know it's because they care and blah, blah, blah, but it's pissing me off. I may have a head injury, but that doesn't mean I'm going to keel over any minute. Yeah, I went through something that's traumatic, doesn't mean I'm going to have an emotional breakdown out of nowhere!

I sighed, "Hey, guys, how's it going?"

"Hey, Pone, how you feeling? It ain't the same at school without you," Brian said, taking the lead as usual. I was appreciative that he left Robin out of that, though undoubtedly, they missed her more than me.

"I'm alright, just tired all the time. I've been here for weeks and today is honestly the first time I really looked around the room," I said, rolling onto my back.

Kelly skipped over to my side and kissed my cheek, she held flowers practically in my face. "We got these for you," she smiled proudly.

I chuckled, grinning my thanks, "Will you put them over near the window for me." She did as I asked. Nice gesture but, goddamn flowers.

Todd shifted from foot to foot and the others settled themselves into various, equally uncomfortable, hospital chairs. I feel bad for my brothers, Two-Bit told me they actually slept in them. I bet Darry's back was killing him, even though he didn't work that week.

"Well, it's nice for you all to stop by…," I mumbled, the room tense and kind of awkward.

They eased eventually and talked about some of the high school drama, I didn't care what-so-ever about. At least, it took up some time. After a while I started to get sleepy again, they noticed and left. I wondered if that was the last time I'd see them or not.

Who really knows what's going to happen now? For all I know, I'll get sent to another foster home around here or maybe in another city. The social worker, nurses, and doctors all know what happened. They seem to just ignore the fact that Darry, Soda, and even Two-Bit weren't supposed to be anywhere near me.

Good, maybe if people minded their own business, I wouldn't be here.

My thoughts drifted back to the dreams I had. I said I love you to Robin. Did I really love her? No, I don't think so. Well, on some level I did. I cared for her deeply enough that every time I thought about her, which happened pretty frequently, that I felt like crying from the ache in my chest.

Mrs. Lucas had looked so fragile and angelic when she died. I felt bad that I couldn't save her, help her, or do anything for either of them to help. I know it was guilt that people would try to shield me from. It wasn't my fault, I know that, but I was there and they died and I didn't.

It was guilt and a bit of shame that I would carry for the rest of my life. It's just something I got to accept. My head was starting to throb, I probably shouldn't think so much.

I wish they weren't weaning me off the pain medications just yet. I wish I didn't have to think or was still stuck in my black oblivion, well I kind of wish that. I wouldn't want to stay there; I can't do that to my brothers. I saw the looks on their faces when I woke up; I swear they looked like every one of their prayers had been answered. I'm lucky to have them backing me up no matter what.

_God, I really want to go home. Please, I know I'm not the best Catholic, but I'm sick and tired and I want to go back home with my brothers. I want to be in Tulsa with the gang and have everything go back to normal. Please, please, please…this is Ponyboy Michael Curtis, by the way._

I sighed, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger…then why do I feel so weak? I don't feel strong now, not physically, mentally, nor emotionally. I know why everyone is treating me like a piece of china, it's because I look like it and feel it.

I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, then I heard, "Does it hurt?"

I opened my eyes to see Johnny at the door. I think it was the first genuine smile I gave all day, "Long time no see, Johnnycakes. It doesn't hurt too badly."

He came over and sprawled out in the chair beside my bed, "I wanted to see you sooner, but I didn't get to come. I came with Two-Bit, just to warn you, he's in a talkative mood."

I groaned, "Don't know if I am up to that," I grimaced.

Johnny smiled, "I'll see if I can rein him in for you," I could hear the note of sarcasm in his voice. Johnny showed this side more than people thought, they just didn't pick it up.

I rolled my eyes, everyone knows Two-Bit is uncontrollable. There is no reining in when it comes it him, there's just going farther and farther outside of the box.

Johnny got a sly look on his face and then he smiled at me, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a chocolate bar.

He laughed as my face lit up, the food was disgusting here and they tried to make me eat broccoli last night. I took it from him, my second genuine smile that day, "Thanks, Johnny," I breathed.

I was practically inhaling it; I didn't want any of the nurses to find out, now did I?

"Don't I get some, Pony?" Johnny asked. I frowned, knowing I should since he brought it to me. Also, he endured that whole ride up here with Two-Bit in a talkative mood because of me…

I broke a non-eaten part off and slowly handed it to him; he started laughing, his eyes teasing. "I was kidding, eat it. I don't think you're supposed to eat it, but oh well. It can't hurt that much, right?" Johnny said, mostly to himself.

Two-Bit came flowing in, "Well, howdy little Curtis."

I mock glared at him, I was happy to see him but I did hate that nickname. "Where have you been, Keith?"

Not bothered in the least, he sat on the side of my bed. "You got some pretty little broads looking after you, I see." He cocked an eyebrow suggestively.

"They're all at least ten years older than me, that's illegal."

"So is having sex and drinking before eighteen. I still did it now didn't I? Rules are there to be broken and there aren't always consequences," he waved a hand at himself; I guess he was an example.

"Yeah there are, those are the reasons you're still in high school. Wait, not finished, those are the reasons you are currently failing high school, _again_," I pointed out.

"You can't prove that. I could pass if I felt like it."

I huffed, not feeling like arguing.

"You look tired, kid, how come?" Two-Bit asked, a heavy double meaning playing on those words.

I repressed a blush and an image of making out with Robin came to mind, I quickly dismissed it. "Brian, Kelly, Todd, and Beth stopped by," I explained, thankfully no one seemed to catch my delay. I didn't feel like explaining why I didn't respond right away, ugh the jokes Two-Bit would start.

He nodded.

I was happy that the two of them stopped by. After a while I got so tired, I don't think I could function properly even if I tried. They noticed and quieted down, listening to a small radio in the corner of the room.

I drifted off, hoping for some peace from all the worry and despair.

* * *

Thought I show Pony's view on everything. This story is coming out to be much longer than I had thought it would. My longest story yet.

The poll is closed and the one-shots to go along with this story won. You're all so interested and supportive, I love it! I already got the first chapter written! It'll be posted when I finish this story first. :)

Review


	24. Court

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

I don't really know how court procedure's work, I never watched the shows or anything so bare with me.

(PPOV)

* * *

I was being released from the hospital this morning. I would've been really happy if it weren't for the fact I was kept at the hospital until the trial. To say I was nervous is putting it lightly. I hate this entire thing. For God's sake, I was going to go and testify at a double murder trial.

The thought of that made me sick. I hadn't been able to this morning, much to the annoyance of the nurse on the morning shift today. I felt bad, because she was new and just wanted to do what she was told and I didn't cooperate. Well, I don't feel that bad; I saved her the job of cleaning up my puke.

I felt sick enough without eating.

My new case worker had somehow gotten me brand new, black, dress pants, and a blue button down shirt with a pale yellow tie. He even got me shoes that were my size. I thanked Mr. Frangello profusely, to be honest I felt wrong accepting it but I couldn't go to court in street clothes either.

I hadn't seen my brothers or anyone from the gang in a couple days. It was so close to the court date that they wouldn't be able to hang around here without the risk of someone important finding out. I know they were all nervous about today too; Darry was going to try and get custody over me reinstated.

I stepped back, looking at myself in the mirror. I looked like shit. I lost weight in the basement and even more when I was in the coma. I looked like a stick. I was paler than normal from lack of sunlight over the last few weeks. Circles under my eyes were dark and noticeable, there from lack of sleep over the last few days.

I was still tired and weak from the injuries. All I've been doing in lying in a bed and I was tired. All I did today was get dressed and I felt like I could sleep for a couple hours. I was like an infant, sleep, eat, and go to the bathroom.

I rubbed my cheek my expression looked weary, something I wasn't used to. The apprehension was really getting to me. I didn't want to spend the day talking about Robin or Mrs. Lucas, I could barley convince myself this was all true.

I had to brush my hair differently in order to cover the scar. Eventually my hair would grow back, I groaned. Why did it have to be my hair? I let my hair fall the way it did naturally, instead of brushing it back. That way, it covered the bald spot and the stitches on the side of my head. My rusty colored hair fell into my eyes. I didn't look that bad, thank goodness. I was sure they're would be reporters taking pictures. The one officer who came in here warned me about it and told me not to say anything.

There was a small knock on the door and my caseworker came in. He didn't look much older than Darry…maybe twenty four. He had tan skin and dark hair, I was pretty sure he was Italian, especially if his last name is an indicator.

I stood up, fiddling with my hair and tie self-consciously. He grinned at me reassuringly, "You cleaned up nice. You ready?"

"No," I told him truthfully.

His smile dimmed a little, "It'll be alright, Ponyboy."

I don't know why, but I trusted this guy or maybe I'm just need to talk that bad. "I can't even accept this whole thing. Now I have to go and talk about it in front of all those people," I whispered, softly.

"Just answer the questions truthfully. You tell them what you know and don't deter from that. You're a good person, Pony, I know you'll do exactly that. Don't let anyone harass you into saying something that isn't true," Mr. Frangello reached out and patted my shoulder. "We got to go, don't want to be late now do we?"

Yes, I do. Maybe he doesn't want to be late but I'd rather not show up at all.

My mind drifted to the fact that Soda, Darry, and I may not be put back together. If I end up being sent to another home, even if the people seem nice, I'll run away. I can't deal with this all over again. I'm finished, I just want to curl up in my bed and no one, not even the state, is telling me otherwise.

XXX

"Mr. Curtis, how was your relationships with victims and the defendant?" The lawyer asked me.

I started with the easiest out of the three, Mrs. Lucas. It still wasn't that easy though. "Well, Mrs. Lucas was a very nice lady. I liked her, I didn't like how motherly she was, but she was a really kind hearted woman. I felt bad for her though, she was a broken person, nice but she didn't have any fight left in her," I said, quietly. Despite how quiet I was, my voice carried in the large, yet silent room.

All the attention was on me as I fidgeted nervously.

"How about Mr. Lucas?" The lawyer asked me.

I swallowed, "My first impression wasn't that bad of him. He seemed like a tough, keep to himself kind of person. But, then I was with him for those first few weeks and I started to get weary-"I was broken off.

"Why did you become weary of him?"

"On the way to the Lucas' that first day, Robin warned me not to get in his way. He could be violent when he got angry. At first, I thought she was toying with me, trying to make me sweat a little. But, the comment stuck to me like glue. Then one night, Robin came home late and Mr. L. was angry because Mrs. L. had been worried," I drawled. "I was in my room and there was yelling and a bang, after that I knew Robin wasn't lying. I'm sure he hit her."

"You didn't see him actually hit her?" The man asked me.

"No, not that time anyway. But, I did hear what he called her, which was bad enough."

"What did he call her?"

"A whore, he basically told her no one would ever want her. Then he made a sick joke about how no one would actually pay for her services," I held back a blush. I felt sick repeating that.

"Were you scared during that specific incident?"

"I was concerned for Robin, and I was scared but not terrified. I grew up on the rougher side of Tulsa, fighting and abuse isn't completely foreign to me," I hoped my explanation didn't make me sound like I was abused.

"How close were you with Robin?" The guy responded. I wonder what his name is.

"Robin wasn't my favorite person in the beginning. She came off as a bit hard and seemed sarcastic and somewhat annoying. But, then I got to know her and saw she was really a good person," I said slowly.

Before I continued, the guy said bluntly, "Did you have a sexual relationship with her?"

"I never had sex with her, but we did kiss before," I answered honestly, suppressing a groan when I saw the gang sharing looks with one another.

"Did you consider her more than a friend then?"

"Yes, yes she was more than a friend to me."

Question after question was asked by more than one lawyer. Many of the questions were basically the same thing. I covered questions about my friends in Tulsa, school in Oklahoma and Tulsa, my family back home.

All of that before we finally took a break. I knew when we came back; the hard part would really start. The only questions I hadn't answered yet were about the actual murders. This day is turning out worse than I thought, and longer.

XXX

I hid out in the back of the court house, away from the flashes of the cameras of reporters. My lawyer was forcing me to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I ate it without tasting it.

I didn't even notice when the gang walked in, "Pone?" Soda asked.

I turned and glanced at them all, I smiled half heartedly. "Hey guys, how'd you get back here?"

Soda acted like there was absolutely nothing wrong, "Franny likes us a lot," he said with a grin. They only sign that told me that this was bothering him was the fact his eyes seemed oddly muted.

I laid my head against the back of the chair; I could only imagine how I looked right now. If I looked anywhere near how I felt, then I probably looked like I should be getting my death bed ready.

Darry laid his warm hand on my shoulder; I shivered when I realized how cold I was. "How you feeling, kiddo?" Darry murmured, concerned.

The entire gang was here, even Dally. I hadn't known they were all coming today. "Fine, I guess. I can't say I'm looking forward to more questioning. I just answered all those damn questions and we haven't even begun talking about _it_."

"It'll be over soon, Ponyboy," Darry lied. We both knew that this wasn't over; even when the case was closed this wouldn't be over.

I glanced at the clock and pointed to it, "We got to be heading back in," I stated, sounded dull and worn even to myself. I yawned into the chair's back and forced myself up. Goddamn, I'm so tired.

I had to take my oath and sit down again, waiting for the ambush of questions.

"Mr. Curtis, I want you to think back to the day you were locked in the basement. Can you tell me about that and how it came about?" He asked, smiling slightly. This was the nicer guy; I didn't mind him as much as Mr. Stoic over to the side.

"Robin and I came in and saw Mr. Lucas standing over his wife. She looked terrified and it was obvious he had been beating her. She was crying silently and looked at us, horrified and scared. It was heartbreaking to see someone looking at you like that," I said, getting caught up in the memory.

"He came after us next. Robin and I fought, well tried to. Usually, we could handle him, but we couldn't that time. He grabbed up by our necks and basically dragged us to the door of the basement. Neither of us struggled because like I said, he had our neck and we were just trying to breath. Mr. Lucas was drunk, maybe high, and he basically through me down the stairs first. I was unconscious by the time I got to the bottom and when I woke up Robin was next to me, unconscious."

"I remember, it took her a long time to wake up and I was terrified she wouldn't. Well, she did but I was pretty sure she had a concussion. My buddy Two-Bit did once and I remember symptoms brought on by concussions and she had a few. So, whenever she went to sleep, I'd wake her up a couple hours later," I explained.

"Were you given food, water, and what did you two do to try and get out?" The nicer lawyer asked me.

"No food or water unless we behaved the way he wanted to, he gave us those terms the second or third day, I don't remember I think second day we were down there. One time, Mrs. L. chucked half a loaf of bread down there, that was all the food we ever got in those five days," I answered. I glanced at Mr. L. for the first time, I had been avoiding it and he looked pissed. "There wasn't a way to get out. The only thing was a window and I couldn't fit, and neither could Robin. The only door led right to Mr. Lucas and it was locked. I heard him and his wife talking, I think this was all brought on by the fact he started taking drugs after he lost his job. He drank from the very beginning," I added.

"How did you get out?"

"He told us to come out. When we got to the top," I swallowed, seeing the whole thing as it ran through my mind's eye. "At the top, he grabbed us in the neck hold again and brought us to the living room. Earlier we had heard a commotion upstairs and it ended up being him killing Mrs. Lucas. She was in the middle, already dead and blood was all over the walls, splattered. Her bloody handprints covered everything," I whispered, trying to hold it together.

"Are you sure she was dead?"

"She was white as a ghost, and her eyes were open and unblinking. I didn't see any signs of breathing, but like I said I was being held by my neck and had no desire to look at that," my voice coming out hard with some emotion.

"What happened next?"

"He came after us; he had laughed about killing his wife. I don't remember what he said to us after that, he could've threatened us, I don't know. I was panicking and Robin and I had made a plan earlier. No matter what, if one of us can get out then we run, get help for the other. If we get out together, take two different roots and we'd meet at the local diner. That never happened. We were weak from lack of food and sleep, the basement was hard to get used to. I 'member I was thrown back and I hit my head, that's all I remember. I didn't see anything else," I whispered.

The rest of the questions were minuscule in comparison. It felt surprisingly good to get all of this off my chest. At the same time, I was ready to curl up and bawl my eyes out.

XXX (The next day)

Today was the day Mr. Lucas was supposed to testify. He went up and answered some of the same questions I had to answer. He pleaded guilty, but didn't look repentant at all.

Darry, Soda, Steve, and Johnny all went up to speak too. Darry and Soda told them why I should be placed back home, I didn't really listen. I had a lot on my mind and was finding it hard to concentrate. I hadn't been able to sleep well the night before and I was tired beyond concentration.

Steve and Johnny were there to say their opinions. They talked about how close me and my brothers were, how close the gang was, how much better off I was at home where I belonged.

After that, we waited for a half an hour before the jury came out with the results.

Mr. Lucas was found guilty for murder in the first degree, attempted murder, child neglect, child abuse, and I think they're were a few more in there.

Then the judge read, "Ponyboy Curtis' custody as been reinstated with Darrel Curtis, case closed."

I felt arms shake me from my stunned state, it was Soda.

Turning into his chest, I broke down and cried.

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Whew, I had to end on a happy note. One more chapter left.

Review please, lets reach 150! Thanks for all of those who have been and who have alerted/favorited ect.


	25. Where I Belong

*I don't own _The Outsiders._

(PPOV)

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The cab of Dad's old, rusting Ford was really too small for the three of us to fit. I was snuggled, happily, in between Darry and Soda. My legs stretched out to the right, on Soda's side. I laid my head on Darry's arm, not really giving a shit if it were tough or not.

I was passed inane worries like that; I didn't need to fucking prove how tough I am after all of this shit. We stayed quiet. The others were riding back in either Steve's truck or the car Dallas borrowed from Buck. They were really just trying to give us some time with each other.

I can't believe yesterday I was put back into the custody of my brother. I heard some talk about talking to the judge we had back in Tulsa and my old case worker, there was supposed to be some sort of investigation. I hope they both get fired. They caused me a lot of trouble…actually I can't say that.

I wouldn't have met Robin otherwise, and I can't regret meeting her. Even though, my heart is hurting pretty bad right now. I'll move on like she told me to, even if it was an imagined version of her, I know that's what she would want.

I feel bad that I won't be able to go to her funeral. It's all the way upstate, almost on the boarder of Oklahoma and Kansas. Darry and Soda can't take more work off than they have, I understand that. I was glad that Robin was at least being buried near her Mother.

I hope they were able to make up. I'm sure they did. I sighed and both my brothers' heads snapped toward me, I pretended not to notice that. Sharing weary looks, they slowly turned back to their original positions. I snuggled closer into Darry's side, he felt nice and warm.

I was so cold all the time.

Despite the good news of being back together, a heavy atmosphere had settled around us in the past half an hour. I know they had questions and I was debating whether or not to get it over with. They'd wait as long as I needed them too, I know that.

I sighed again, "What do you want to know?" I asked, sounding hollow even to myself.

Soda stared at me for a moment; he took my question as an invitation to say what he wanted, "I'm sorry you lost her, Pony." Out of the corner of Darry's eye, he was watching me. He was gauging my reaction, no doubt.

I nodded in response. I don't really like when people say their sorry for something that's not their fault. I didn't like at my parents' funeral and I don't like it now. 'Sorry' wasn't bringing her back.

Darry murmured quietly, "Y'all didn't tell us you were together."

"Or that you kissed," Soda added, sounding hurt.

"It didn't happen until later, after you guys visited. It wasn't long after and I didn't really want to tell you in a letter, it was weird," I muttered, blushing a bit.

Soda smiled, happier now that he knew I wasn't keeping something like that from him. His face dropped slowly, "Why didn't you tell us about _him_. Even if you didn't tell us, what about someone else, anyone, you could've told the fuzz," Soda said in a pained whisper, I could hear the hate in his voice too.

I looked away from his face and didn't even dare look at Darry; I could feel both their eyes on me, "It wasn't that bad at first. I didn't want to be any more trouble. Plus, I figured with me gone Darry could have a better social life, dating girls and stuff," I could see they were going to bring up the first beating, the one when I was home alone. "Then, when he beat me until I was unconscious that one time, I-I didn't want to accept it?" I said it as it were a question instead of fact. "I was ashamed that he beat me like that, I felt kind of pathetic. I figured I could avoid it again. Robin never had anything real bad happen there and I trusted her, she'd been there for a year. Neither of us saw any of that coming," I whispered.

I glanced at the two of them after a minute of silence, Soda had a strange expression on his face and Darry had sad understanding on his. Soda made a small whining sound, like he wanted to cry, "You don't got nothing to be ashamed of, Ponyboy."

"He's right," Darry agreed.

"I've heard it all before," I said in a 'drop it' tone.

We were quiet for a good twenty minutes. Darry and Soda didn't really know what to say. There wasn't really anything to say. I knew if I wanted to talk I could go to them, they knew I'd come when I wanted.

I thought back to being the basement with Robin. I thought back to the night we accidently fell asleep together in the same bed. She was so nice to me when I had that nightmare; she taught me how to shave for God's sake.

Near tears I chocked, "I'm going to miss her real bad. I really cared about her." I sounded like a lost little kid who was looking for his mother.

Soda wrapped an arm around me and dragged me over to him. He rubbed my back soothingly, "It'll get better, Pony. You know that."

I watched the sun setting over the horizon as we sped down the highway. All reds and oranges stroked the sky; I smiled a little at it. It'd been a long while since I seen the sunset.

I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, or the next day, or ten years down the road, but I know one thing: All those days will be spent with my family, home, where I belong.

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That's all folks.

I really enjoyed writing this story, my longest one yet! You all were so great. Thanks for the alerts/favorites/reviews ect.

**"Different Paths"** is the name of my **next story**. It'll be posted very soon. It'll be different one-shots that have to do with this story. Some Robin may still be alive in. I already have one nearly finished. I won't have much time for posting this week, I got to read a book on genetic engineering and write a three page paper on it. Anyway, keep a look out for that, it'll be up very soon and I really like the first one already, hehe. Some will be short, some long, some sweet, some dark, I can't wait to write the ones I have in mind. If you have any ideas, PM me!

Review!!!


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